Commentary:
Why commit to a meal when I can't even commit to a Netflix series? 🍽️😂📺
235 Funny eating quotes
I love staying in a hotel. I’m eating room service in bed while I watch the worst TV show of all time on cable television. I’m working out in the gym and swimming in the pool. I’m using the amenities. To hell with Airbnb.
Commentary:
Living the high life: gourmet room service, epic TV flops, and the hope that the gym cancels out the dessert 🍕📺🏊♂️🍰
The bad news is I forgot to wear my spaghetti-eating shirt. The good news is I have a new spaghetti-eating shirt.
Commentary:
Who knew spaghetti was so fashion-forward? 🍝👕 #NewTrends
Currently helping my nephew look for his M&M’s that I ate yesterday.
Commentary:
Oops! I think I need to file this under 'Mission Impossible'. 🍫🔍😬
I love surprising my metabolism. It never knows what’s coming—either absolute starvation or 1,000+ calories all at once.
Commentary:
The suspense is real—my metabolism thinks it's on a rollercoaster of carbs and confusions! 🎢🍕🍩🤔
The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was making all of the food that is unhealthy for you taste so good.
Commentary:
Why is it that every bite of broccoli feels like betrayal when pizza exists? 🍕😈🥦
My weight loss journey is just the three hours in between meals.
Commentary:
Sounds like a well-balanced diet of hopeful thinking and frequent snacking! 🍔⏳😂
Today feels like a good day for a cheeseburger.
Commentary:
Who knew the day planner could be so delicious? 🍔😄
Want to come over and lay around naked, eating grapes like we’re in a Renaissance painting.
Commentary:
Renaissance vibes: lounging in style with grapes and no pants! 🍇🎨😊
Gonna eat birthday cake all day because it’s someone’s birthday out there, and we’re about to celebrate together, stranger.
Commentary:
Sounds like a delicious plan! 🎂 Why not turn every day into a cake-hunting holiday? Let's celebrate some stranger's birthday calories! 🎉😂