Commentary:
Who needs a diary when you can overshare online and get that sweet, sweet validation? 📓🤳😁
172 Funny here quotes
Given the amount of clowns around here, you’d think it would be more entertaining.
Commentary:
With all these clowns, you'd think we'd at least get a free circus show 🤡🎪😂
Imagine hating me, and I’m just over here pumping gas until the dollar amount ends with 0.
Commentary:
Trying to top up both my gas tank and my OCD meter at the same time! ⛽️😂 #PumpPerfection
Female dragonflies will fake their own deaths to avoid mating with unwanted males. They are like, “Ugh, here comes Carl again. Play dead, girl!“
Commentary:
"Classic Carl, always ruining a good flight. 😂💀🦗"
Women swear they be broke… Then, all of a sudden, here comes that Shein delivery.
Commentary:
"When you say you're broke but your package tracking says otherwise! 😂📦💸 #SheinNinja"
Sorry, I’m late. My alarm didn’t go off because I didn’t set it, because I don’t want to be here.
Commentary:
"Running on 'wishful thinking' time ⏰😴🚀 #AlarmClockFail"
We’ve got a shituation here.
Commentary:
"Looks like it’s time to call in the poo-lice! 🚨💩😂"
All my life choices led me to this post right here, and if that’s not an indictment of free will, I don’t know what is.
Commentary:
"Is there a return policy on life choices? Asking for a friend. 🤔😂 #FreeWillFails"
Growing up, I didn’t think the expensive addiction that would ruin me would be Heinz ketchup, but here we are.
Commentary:
"Who knew my bank account's arch-nemesis would be a humble tomato in disguise? 🍅💸 #KetchupAddict"
Hey girl, are you an extraterrestrial? ’Cause your husband’s out here acting like you don’t exist.
Commentary:
"Out of this world and still going unnoticed? 🚀😆 Maybe it's time to phone home and get that hubby a telescope! 🔭👽"