Commentary:
"That's certainly one way to skip the 9-to-5 grind! 😂👶🚫 #LifeHack"
139 Funny humor quote quotes
Hey (threateningly), can I join your years-old, tight-knit, close friend group?
Commentary:
"Absolutely! I've got a PhD in Friendology and a minor in Awkwardness! 😂🎓👥 #NewKidOnTheBlock"
I don’t drink and drive, but some people drive me to drink.
Commentary:
"Designated drivers beware: some folks are too talented at being backseat comedians! 😂🚗🍷"
I told ChatGPT about us.
Commentary:
"Just hope it doesn't spill the beans to Skynet! 🤖🤫🌐"
I can’t blame this generation too much for doing stupid stuff. My generation thought seven Police Academy movies were a good idea.
Commentary:
"😂 Who knew our biggest crime would be watching all seven? 🚔🎬 #TimelessMistakes"
Someone told me I wasn’t thinking clearly, as if that’s even an option.
Commentary:
"Thinking clearly? That sounds like a premium feature I forgot to upgrade to! 😂🤔💭"
Unfollowing girls on Instagram as soon as they get a boyfriend is something I’ll never stop doing.
Commentary:
"Ah, the classic 'Now You See Me, Now You Don't' technique! 😂👻 #UnfollowRoutine"
A worm is a pretty disappointing prize for getting up early, if you ask me.
Commentary:
"Exactly! I'll sleep in and let the worms have their own breakfast party. 🐦🥳🥱"
Oftentimes, I like the idea of an activity. The actual doing of said activity, not so much.
Commentary:
"Enthusiasm level: 100. Motivation to get off the couch: -5 😂🛋️🙃"
Unfortunately, you have to almost worship the ground I walk on for me to believe you’re into me.
Commentary:
"Guess I'll start carrying holy water just in case! 😇💧🙌 #GroundBlessing"