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26 Funny married quotes

Do you also watch porn until the end to see if they end up getting married?

3 months ago

I’ve never been married, but I tell people I’m divorced so they won’t think something is wrong with me.

3 months ago

Get married and have kids so that you can Google things like “How to teach your kid to not bite”.

3 months ago

It’s been my experience that people seem a lot nicer before we get married.

3 months ago

Instead of getting married again, I’m going to find a woman I don’t like and give her a house.

3 months ago

Being married means mostly shouting “What?” from other rooms.

3 months ago