Wordgag ツ

5 months ago
Share →: No one my age is single because they’re all unhappily married.

Commentary:
"Who knew being single was the new trend among the *well-seasoned* crowd? 🤣 Looks like they've figured out the secret to eternal happiness – avoiding marriage! 🚫💍 #SingleAndSassy"
5 months ago
Share →: You don’t scare me, I was married once.

Commentary:
"Ah, the battle-tested warrior of relationships! 💪🏼💍 Who needs fear when you've survived the ultimate challenge? Take that, unknown adversaries! 😂 #MarriageWarrior"
6 months ago
Share →: The plan was simple: finish school, find a job and get married at 25. But now I don’t understand anything anymore.

Commentary:
🎓💼💍 "Ah, the perfectly laid out plan – so beautiful in theory, yet quite the unruly troublemaker in practice! Life really knows how to keep us on our toes, doesn't it? 🤷‍♂️ Who knew that choosing a career and finding 'the one' could be such wild adventures! Buckle up, friend, because the unexpected twists make it all the more exciting! 🌪️"
6 months ago
Share →: Once married, the woman takes over the entire closet and the man stores everything he owns in his left cargo pocket.

Commentary:
"Ah, the age-old battle of the closet space! 🧥👗 Sounds like marriage is all about compromise…and finding creative storage solutions in cargo pockets! 🤣🙈 #MarriageStruggles"

Fun Fact or Trivia:
Did you know that in Ancient Rome, men used to carry their personal belongings in a small pouch called a 'loculus', which was usually worn on the left side? 🕰️👛
6 months ago
Share →: Getting married soon. Just need a spouse.

Commentary:
"Sounds like you've got all the details figured out except for that tiny 'spouse' detail! 🤷‍♂️ May your search for the missing puzzle piece be as exciting as planning the wedding itself! 💍🕵️"
6 months ago
Share →: I think it’s sad that getting married is one of the only ways to guarantee somebody will be forced to make a speech about how great you are.

Commentary:
Ah, the pressure of marriage, where love meets performance anxiety! 💍🎤 Just remember, if your partner's speech is lacking, they can always blame it on nerves or forgetfulness… hopefully not on actually regretting saying "I do"! 😅👰‍♂️
6 months ago
Share →: Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck got engaged, broke up, married other people, had children, reunited, got married, broke up again, and I’ve been single that whole time.

Commentary:
"Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck's relationship timeline resembles a rollercoaster ride 🎢, while my love life has been more like a never-ending carousel 🎠 – going around in circles, but never quite getting anywhere! 🙃 #SingleLife"
6 months ago
Share →: I’d like to meet the person who decided that if you wanted to get married fast, it had to be done by Elvis.

Commentary:
Oh, the legend of speedy marriages courtesy of the King himself, Elvis Presley! 🕺 Who knew that tying the knot quickly would forever be associated with hip thrusts and sideburns? 😂 Maybe Elvis just wanted to make sure lovebirds didn't leave the building without saying "I do"! 💍🎶 #MarriageGoals #ElvisTime
6 months ago
Share →: If I’d married a wealthier man, I’d be lying on a fancier couch right now refusing to clean bigger rooms.

Commentary:
"Who needs bigger rooms to clean when you can just hire someone to do it for you? 😆💰 #RichWifeGoals"
6 months ago
Share →: Biblical loophole: It’s not premarital sex if you never intend to get married.

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic biblical loophole – taking 'til death do us part' to a whole new level! 😂 Who knew the key to avoiding premarital sex was just never planning on getting married in the first place? 😜 #LifeHacks"