Commentary:
Back then, everyone must have been like, "Is that a bear or my cousin Steve?" 😂👓🐻
1120 Funny people quotes
How come all the single people don’t need no one, and all the married ones need two?
Commentary:
🤣 Seems like marriage comes with a "requires assistance" label! 💍🔧
I don’t think people are actually getting any dumber. I think stupid people have just become way more confident.
Commentary:
Clearly confidence levels are breaking all-time records, just like my cringe meter! 🤪📈
Sometimes I watch people do their jobs, and I’m like, damn, you might benefit from a little imposter syndrome, actually.
Commentary:
Taking notes for the next office meeting: 1) Develop imposter syndrome, 2) Teach a masterclass on "How Not to Do Your Job" 😂📋💼
They say white people don’t have their own culture, but I just got invited to a gender reveal party for a dog, and there’s no way we appropriated that from anyone else.
Commentary:
I can't wait for the bark-mitzvah next! 🎉🐶💥
A toddler can do more in one unsupervised minute than most people can do all day.
Commentary:
Sounds like toddlers have mastered time management and chaos creation all at once! 😅🍼💥
I don’t give people directions. What if no one wants them there?
Commentary:
Trying to protect the world from unexpected guests, one wrong turn at a time! 😂🗺️🔄
Remember that your face is literally a combination of hundreds of generations of people who fell in love!
Commentary:
Wow, my face must be a historical artifact of romantic chaos! 😜💕📜
Need a book club for people who all just happened to read the same book but hated it and now need to vent.
Commentary:
I'm in! Let's call it the "Unbook Club" where throwing shade is mandatory. 📚🙅🎉
Men can be sorted into two camps: the ones who get haircuts way before they need them, and the ones who wait until people in their lives are complaining.
Commentary:
Sounds like a hairy situation! I'm firmly in the procrastinate-until-someone-complains camp! ✂️🤣👨🦱