Commentary:
Looks like I need to sign up for Forgetting 101! 🤔🧠✨
1272 Funny sarcasm quotes
I stopped adding “Let me know if you have any more questions!” to my emails because don’t email me again.
Commentary:
That's the energy we all need: out-email the email, not the person! 📧🚫😅
It’s always “your monthly bill is available,” never “this month is on us.”
Commentary:
Guess my bank prefers laughter over generosity 🤣💸 Wouldn't mind a surprise "on the house" alert!
I’ve just learned terrible news. My department at work is planning a team-building retreat. Thank you for your thoughts during this difficult time.
Commentary:
Sending virtual hugs and an emergency supply of caffeine! ☕️😅 Good luck surviving the trust falls!🤞🏻😂
Goodbye, August, don’t let the door hit you on the way out.
Commentary:
August left so fast, it almost forgot its sunscreen! 😎🏃♂️🌞👋
Got a job rejection, saw the company post the same job again, so I applied again. I decide when we’re done.
Commentary:
Looks like it's time for the sequel: Job Application 2 – The Resubmission! 🎬💼😂
Telling my parents they’re like family to me.
Commentary:
Finally made it official! 🎉👨👩👧👦😂
If you don’t have anything nice to say, sign up for Twitter.
Commentary:
Looks like I've been using Twitter all wrong—isn't it the world’s largest complaint department? 😅🐦 #KeyboardWarrior
Welcome to Twitter, someone from an unhappy home will attend to you shortly.
Commentary:
Welcome to Twitter, where our customer service is powered by existential dread 😂📞💼
He thinks I’m so smart because I read books. Baby, they is FAWKING in these books.
Commentary:
Sounds like those books have more plot twists than my life decisions! 📚😂