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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇩 has viewed:

My diet was going really well until I woke up.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has viewed:

The only reason I haven’t gone crazy yet is because I’m just too lazy.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has downloaded:

Tourists love to think that they are not like other tourists.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

Nobody knows my next move. Not even me.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has bookmarked:

I was not prepared for my knees to sound like someone is breaking spaghetti noodles in half every time I go up the stairs.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

On today’s family vacation agenda: my parents read the internet out loud.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

Notifications are a reminder that you exist.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has downloaded:

I don’t want to end this year on bad terms with anybody. Could you please apologize to me?

Someone from 🇮🇱 has bookmarked:

I know it’s true because the people on the internet said so.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has downloaded:

I wonder how many people think, “What the hell?” after talking to me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1842 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,004

Funny Quotes Topics

14,798

Funny Quotes Images

12,004

25 seconds ago

3,449

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Slack:

Despite removing all the stains, I still lost my job as a church window cleaner.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Blackout curtains because I’ll decide what time it is.

Reported on YouTube:

When Hulk wrecks shit he’s “incredible.” When I do it I’m “causing a scene” and “need to leave this place immediately.”

Reported on Reddit:

Farting, but with eye contact.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

A clever man fills his wife’s closet with so many clothes that no other man can fit in.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Sometimes I tell myself I should stop drinking so much, but I’m not about to listen to a drunk who’s talking to himself.

Spotted on Twitch:

Wouldn’t it be nice if you could donate your own body fat to those who need it more urgently?

Spotted on Threads:

I’m so sick of TV shows and movies where there are no likable characters. I don’t need to spend an hour with people I hate, I already have my life.

Just shared via Snapchat:

I’ve never wished a man dead, but I’ve read some obituaries with great pleasure.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

You gotta ask people nowadays, are you single single, mad at your partner single, blocked single or single just in your head.

Home » Funny Stain Quotes

Funny stain quotes

Funny stain quotes bring a splash of humor to those pesky spots that love to crash our outfits and furniture 🎉👕 Whether it’s coffee, wine, or mysterious blobs, these witty lines turn stains into laughs 😂✨ Perfect for brightening your day or sharing a giggle with friends—because sometimes, all you can do is laugh at life’s little messes! 🎨🧼 #StainHumor #OopsMoments

New funny stain quotes 👇

3 days ago
Share →: Despite removing all the stains, I still lost my job as a church window cleaner.

Commentary:
Sounds like you really took "cleanliness is next to godliness" to the next level! 😇🪟✨
6 months ago
Share →: My dentist said my teeth were stained and asked if I smoke or drink coffee? I said, “I drink it.”

Commentary:
Well, well, well, looks like this person knows how to multitask – staying awake with coffee while also staining those pearly whites! 😂🦷☕️ Just remember, moderation is key…unless you're trying to match your teeth with your favorite coffee mug!
6 months ago
Share →: I once made the irresponsible decision to drink and drive and now I have to live the rest of my days with a coffee stain on my favorite sweater.

Commentary:
"Lesson learned the hard way: a coffee stain on a white sweater is not a fashion statement, no matter how hard you try ☕️🚗 #DrivingDisasters"
6 months ago
Share →: Fancy restaurants are self-esteem destroyers because good luck not leaving an embarrassing stain on the white table cloth. Ever.

Commentary:
"Fine dining: where the only thing more intimidating than the prices is trying to navigate through a meal without causing a culinary catastrophe on that pristine tablecloth! 🍴😅 Don't worry, just consider it a modern art installation at the end of the meal! 🎨😜"

For even more funny stain quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny stain quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1842 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,004

Funny Quotes Topics

14,798

Funny Quotes Images

12,004

25 seconds ago

3,432

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

Not many quicksand-related deaths since the 1970s. Thank God the authorities got that nightmare under control.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

Sucking melted cheese off the burger wrapper as God intended.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

Folding laundry is like packing to stay home.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

Without freedom of speech we wouldn’t know who the idiots are.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has shared:

They’re making me do work at work.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has copied:

A Tinder type app, but it matches you with sandwiches.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has downloaded:

I don’t always clear my calculator, but when I do, I hit both C and CE a bunch of times because I don’t know exactly what they do.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

Potato chips ARE vegetables! I exclaim as I tear open the third bag.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has viewed:

At a certain age, all you really want is a good mattress.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

Caught a belt loop on a door handle and got yanked back with such force that my audio is no longer in sync with my actions.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WhatsApp:

It’s so foggy outside. Y’all gotta stop vaping.

Spotted on WeChat:

To cut the long story short, I have spent all my money.

Reported on Discord:

A man outside Boots told me that Jesus died for my sins. Thanks for spoiling the end of the Bible. I was only up to the bit with the fish.

Going viral on Twitch:

My youngest started kindergarten today and I cried, but mostly for his teachers.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

If I block you and you email me, you’re getting another chance.

Making waves on TikTok:

I don’t really like the song “I’ve Got a Feeling” by Black Eyed Peas, but I just like the part where they say “Mazel Tov.”

Just landed via Slack:

King-sized beds: Because you both want to sleep on the same mattress, but not in the same zip code.

Seen just now on YouTube:

I believe my ex-wife is days away from having a nuclear weapon.

Just landed via Messenger:

I’m ready for a new relationship. My past is buried in the backyard, to fertilize the tomatoes.

Reported on YouTube:

I want someone who will look at me the same way I look at chocolate cake.

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