Wordgag ツ

4 months ago
Share →: It’s almost bed time, so I’ll just check my e-mail, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and watch a season of my favorite show on Netflix real quick.

Commentary:
Ah, the classic bedtime routine of the modern multitasker – a quick check of all social media platforms, with just a dash of binge-watching thrown in for good measure. Who needs sleep when you can catch up on the latest posts and episodes, right? Just remember, Netflix has a way of turning "one more episode" into a full-on nocturnal adventure! Sweet dreams and happy scrolling!
4 months ago
Share →: If you scroll Twitter long enough, you too can burn calories by shaking your head.

Commentary:
Wow, Twitter should come with a warning label: "Caution! May result in unintentional exercise from vigorous head shaking 🤯💪😂 #TwitterWorkout"
5 months ago
Share →: Deleting tweets like a writer who burns his manuscripts.

Commentary:
"Deleting tweets with the same level of dramatic flair as a writer setting fire to their unpublished works – a digital bonfire of regret and reconsideration."
5 months ago
Share →: Twitter is a prime example why most of us shouldn’t be left unsupervised.

Commentary:
Oh, Twitter – the land of hot takes and questionable decisions! 🐦🔥 It's like a chaotic party where the only rule is "tweet now, think later." 🎉🤔 Who knew 280 characters could cause so much trouble? 😂 Just remember, sometimes it's best to have a chaperone in the form of common sense! 🤓🚨 #TweetResponsibly
5 months ago
Share →: Twitter is fun. You kinda just talk to yourself and sometimes someone replies.

Commentary:
"Twitter: Where you can have deep conversations with yourself and occasionally get interrupted by strangers 🐦🗣️ #TalkingToMyself #TwitterLife"
5 months ago
Share →: Jesus spent his time among the mentally ill, the poor and unemployed, the prostitutes. So, in a way, by being on Twitter, we’re like Jesus.

Commentary:
Well, if we're on Twitter like Jesus, does that mean we're spreading the digital version of salvation in 280 characters or less? 🙏📱 Just think of retweets as miracles and hashtags as blessings! 😄 #TwitterJesus #DigitalDiscipleship
5 months ago
Share →: That was a nice hour long Twitter scroll. Feel much worse as always. See you guys tomorrow.

Commentary:
"Ah, the infamous hour-long Twitter scroll – the digital equivalent of falling down a rabbit hole 🐇. Just remember, the only way is up! See you guys tomorrow for another round of social media shenanigans 📱😅."
5 months ago
Share →: Twitter is cool because you can figure out what’s going on in the world through memes instead of watching the news.

Commentary:
Absolutely! 😂🌎 Who needs news anchors when you've got memes to decode the chaos of the world, right? Twitter: where laughter and the latest happenings unite! 🐦🤣 #MemesOverNews
5 months ago
Share →: Twitter is the most fun you can have on the toilet.

Commentary:
"Twitter: where your tweets flow like your creativity and your bowels 💩 A digital escape as you answer nature's call! 🚽😆 #TweetingFromTheThrone"
5 months ago
Share →: Half of Twitter is horny, half is depressed and the other half don’t know how to do math.

Commentary:
"So basically, Twitter is a place where 150% of people exist… 🤔. It's a mathematically challenged, emotionally volatile bonanza! Who said you can't be horny, depressed, and bad at math all at the same time? Twitter says otherwise! 🤣 #TwitterLogic"