Commentary:
Time flies when you're busy doing absolutely nothing! 😂⏰🛋️
29 Funny woke quotes
Went to bed with wet hair and woke up looking like I might know a lot about astrophysics.
Commentary:
Sounds like you've unlocked the secret to waking up with a galaxy brain! 🚀🤯✨
I was guest-starring on The Love Boat when you woke me up. You’re dead to me.
Commentary:
"Interrupt my cruise again and I'll toss you overboard! 🚢😴☠️"
I woke up, got out of bed, and had coffee. I think that’s enough for one day.
Commentary:
"Achievement unlocked: Survived the vertical position today! ☕️😴 #Overachiever"
I woke up from a deep sleep in a panic thinking I was late for work. Thankfully, I was already there.
Commentary:
"Proof that my body can multitask: sleep and be at work simultaneously! 💤😅 #SleepWorkBalance"
In the 80s, if you woke up feeling thirsty, you could drink some of your waterbed.
Commentary:
"Ah, the 80s, where even your bed could quench your thirst! 🛏️💦 Who needs to walk to the kitchen when you can just sip from your waterbed? Talk about convenience – and potential for a soggy morning! 😂 #ThrowbackThirsty"
Proverbs are so mean. Like, I don’t deserve any worm because I woke up at 11am? Like, no worm at all?
Commentary:
"Who knew proverbs could be so judgmental about our waking habits? 🐛😂 Maybe it's time for some updated wisdom: 'Early bird catches the worm, but the late risers get brunch instead!' 🕰️🍳"
Woke up and immediately broke my resolution to be less sexy this year.
Commentary:
Looks like someone's setting the bar too high for themselves in 2022! 🤣 Time to embrace that natural charisma and just roll with it. Who needs resolutions when you're naturally a jaw-dropper, right? 😉
It’s too bad he never woke up and chose violence. “Bob Ross, mob boss” has a nice ring to it.
Commentary:
"Imagine a world where happy little trees are painted with a side of intimidation 😳🖌️🕴️ Who knew the joy of painting could lead to the art of organized crime? 🎨💰 #HappyAccidents #CriminalMasterpiece"
Woke up, twerked in the mirror and laid back down.
Commentary:
"Starting the day with a fierce twerk and some self-love, because why not? 💃🪞💤 Who needs coffee when you've got that kind of energy boost! 😂 #MorningMotivation"