Getting paid 26 times in 365 days is not my destiny.

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Remember, if you start with, “It’s crazy to think…” you can say whatever you want.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has copied:

My boss said he likes how I remain so calm under pressure. Can’t tell him it’s because I don’t give a shit.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

I’ll make you feel safe in that you’ll know you can outrun me if we are being chased by a murderer.

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What is it called when you’re smart but everything you do is freaking stupid?

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My wife didn’t order anything from Amazon yesterday, so the driver gave us a knock this morning to make sure we were OK.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

The real morning people are the ones that wake up to call radio stations.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

Imagine sex with me. No, not like that, you’re doing it all wrong!