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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

Sometimes I do something completely out of character, like say no to a slice of pizza, or trust someone.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

Girls will be like “I have so much to do” then grab some snacks and start watching a 10 part docuseries on serial killers.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has bookmarked:

I wish I loved anything as much as my two year old loves pulling my pants down.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

My phone storage is full so I guess it’s time to delete the 27 second video I took of a spiderweb four years ago.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

I can’t wait to see my older sister so she can point out I have more gray hair than she does.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has shared:

Googling “effect vs affect” in an incognito window.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

Do people who do triathlons know that they don’t have to?

Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

If at first you don’t succeed, the internet will let you know immediately.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has shared:

My cat and I talked it over and no we don’t think that I’m crazy.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has bookmarked:

If you’re out shopping today, be nice to retail workers. It’s not their fault you waited until Marys waters broke before you started your shopping.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

777 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,939

Funny Quotes Topics

13,912

Funny Quotes Images

10,939

59 minutes ago

3,437

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Instagram:

Packed all my meds into one bottle for a trip and accidentally invented the best trail mix.

Spotted on TikTok:

It’s funny how you can annoy unhappy people by remaining calm.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Filling animals with helium is kinda weird, but whatever floats your goat.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Who is this Rorschach guy and where did he get all the pictures of my parents fighting?

Breaking via X:

I put my pants on like everyone else. With hope they still fit.

Just shared via Twitch:

The person who invented autocorrect should burn in hello.

Breaking via YouTube:

Washing my hands in the sink and then wiping them on my cat, like a towel.

Spotted on Telegram:

If you keep the house dark, not only do you save on electricity, but it also looks cleaner.

Just shared via Slack:

Getting up early would be easier if we could keep our eyes closed.

Just landed via Twitch:

“I can’t possibly lose this if I put it here” I say to myself before completely forgetting where here is.

Life is just resetting your password until you die.

5 months ago

Life is just resetting your password until you die.

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Commentary:
Life is basically a never-ending cycle of "forgot password" links and CAPTCHA tests! 🔑💻 Just when you think you've got it all figured out, there goes another "reset password" email to keep you on your toes. 😂💀 #LifeStruggles #TechSavvyGhost

death, die, existence, humor, irony, just, life, password, resetting, struggle, technology

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

777 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,939

Funny Quotes Topics

13,912

Funny Quotes Images

10,939

59 minutes ago

3,425

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

My addiction to buying things I don’t need started at the school book fair.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

Dating is just wondering why someone is single and then slowly figuring it out.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has shared:

“New recipe” is code for “less content, but worse ingredients”.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has downloaded:

I’ve never met a cake I didn’t want to fork.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

That annoying moment when you’re texting someone and autocorrect decides to join the conversation.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has viewed:

Please solve a murder to prove you’re not a bot.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

Taking the day off to brush up on conspiracy theories and really get this family party started.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has copied:

Maybe, deep in its code, ChatGPT dreams of being a sentient Game Boy resting by the shore—no updates, no inputs, just the tide.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has viewed:

Being gracefully insane is the secret to a happy life.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

“Are you single?” No, I’m in a hallucinationship.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on X:

At the gym and I forgot my headphones and now I have to listen to my own thoughts. Send help.

Just landed via Slack:

My bed wasn’t feeling well this morning, so I had to stay home to take care of it.

Spotted on Reddit:

I’m addicted to placebos.

Just shared via Instagram:

Roses are red, I’m staying in bed. I’ve made no plans, besides pretending I’m dead.

Shared recently on Twitch:

I thought I wanted a career. Turns out all I wanted is paychecks.

Spotted on Messenger:

Being Leonardo DiCaprio is like driving in a school zone. You don’t go above twenty-five.

Making waves on Twitch:

The man who invented autocorrect has died. Restaurant in peace.

Shared recently on Telegram:

If your drinking story doesn’t involve law enforcement, I’m not listening.

Just shared via WeChat:

I pretend I don’t care about stuff, but that’s only because I have no idea what’s going on around me at any given time.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

I don’t understand how spending more money than I earn is irresponsible. I’m giving more than I take. I’m generous.

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