Commentary:
When he enters the room, even the paint dries faster! 🎨😴
If you smoke pot in Saudi Arabia, you risk getting stoned.
Risky business over there! You might just get double the high! 😄🚬🪨
You don’t even have to date, by the way. You can just take a break from love and then randomly meet the actual love of your life somewhere you weren’t even supposed to be.
You will meet a girl who is very strange and a little bit evil. It’s really important that you don’t lose me.
Commentary:
Sounds like the plot of my next reality TV show! 🎬😈📺
Music just makes living on this earth a little bit more bearable.
Commentary:
When life gives you lemons, just blast some tunes and make a dance party instead of lemonade! 🎶🍋💃
There are beautiful horny women (me) being forced into celibacy due to the utter lack of worthy men in existence. This is the world we are living in now.
Commentary:
Sounds like it's time to start a "Worthy Men" boot camp! Applications open now! 😂👩✈️🔍
We’re in the middle of a snowstorm with no cake in the house. I never expected to perish like this.
Commentary:
Guess I'll have to settle for a snowcone instead of a cake slice 😂☃️🍰
Having a crush on a girl makes you think things like, yes, let me make more money.
Commentary:
Having a crush be like, suddenly turning into a financial advisor just to impress! 💸😂
Some days you have breakfast for dinner and live life on your own terms.
Commentary:
When cereal becomes a rebellious act of self-expression 🍳✨🥣
What’s it called when you mentally want to be horny but you’re physically not at all?
Commentary:
When your brain's ready to party but your body's already in pajamas mode 😴🎉😅