Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

If lying was a job some people would be billionaires.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has bookmarked:

Of all her outfits, my shirt and no underwear will always be my favorite.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has downloaded:

For a long time, I didn’t know what to do with my strange thoughts. Then I signed up for Facebook.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

Which wine pairs best with WWIII?

Someone from 🇺🇿 has downloaded:

Student life is all about convincing your parents that you are studying, convincing your friends that you are not, and convincing yourself that you’ll study from tomorrow.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

Exorcist came by. Says house isn’t possessed, just incredibly poorly built.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has shared:

But if i put my laundry away, the laundry chair will be out of a job.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

Accidentally made eye contact with the sweets at the grocery store and now have to declare bankruptcy.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

I failed as a person; I’m a dinosaur now.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has shared:

I haven’t cleaned my shower in so long, it’s becoming a terrarium. Absolutely gorgeous.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,600

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Reddit:

I love being wrong, it’s just like being right except easier and I get to be stupid, which is my favorite thing.

Just landed via Threads:

A lot of people think you need a lot of money to buy clothes. And they’re right.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Not gonna lie, I just assume everyone is AI now.

Trending via Facebook:

I’m not good at solving Pi, but I’m really good at eating it.

Just landed via Messenger:

I’ve been following this strict diet all week and so far all I’ve lost is my patience.

Seen just now on WeChat:

I don’t need a psychic to tell me which planets make me sad. It’s earth.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Damn boy, are you a horoscope? Because I’m selectively focusing on the parts of you that make sense for me.

Breaking via Discord:

I wish my doctor would put down a little treat to distract me like my vet does for my dog.

Just landed via TikTok:

I just tried on my summer wardrobe. The only thing I managed to get into was a state of panic.

Spotted on Instagram:

All I want I for Christmas is to go to the mall in 1986.

The brand name Oral B is so funny to me. WTF does the B stand for?

4 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Maybe it's 'Bristles', but my money's on 'Bewildered' because I'm still trying to figure it out 😂🪥"

abbreviation, b, brand, brand name, care, dental, dental care, Funny, humor, me, name, oral, Oral B, question, stand, toothpaste, WTF

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

He probably could have just called himself “Andre.” I think I would have figured out The Giant part on my own.

0

2 months ago

Andre, giant, humor, i, just, nickname, observation, own, self-identification, think, wit
My wallet is like an onion; opening it makes me cry.

0

2 months ago

cry, crying, expense, finance, humor, joke, me, money, onion, opening, sarcasm, wallet
Most people think that I’m arrogant, but who cares what peasants think.

0

2 months ago

arrogance, confidence, disregard, ego, humor, most, peasant, peasants, people, pride, think
There are people who leave comments on porn videos.

0

2 months ago

comments, leave, people, porn, videos
Snaccident: eating a whole bag of Doritos in one sitting.

0

2 months ago

bag, binge, Doritos, eating, food, guilty, guilty pleasure, humor, pleasure, sitting, snaccident, snack, whole
Deciding if I should heal or just give up and go completely insane.

0

2 months ago

choices, coping, decision, give, give up, heal, health, humor, i, insane, just, mental, mental health, should, struggle

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

13 shares on Reddit this month:

I’ve realized about a third of my life is spent trying to ignore the fact that I have to pee.

86 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I want a man who doesn’t annoy me while I’m constantly getting on his nerves. It can’t be that difficult.

67 shares on Pinterest this month:

I see people my age out there climbing mountains and skydiving, and here I am feeling good about myself because I got my leg through my underwear without losing my balance.

39 shares on Discord this month:

Good morning to everyone except my baby, who already said good morning to me at 1 a.m., 3 a.m., and 5:46 a.m.

37 shares on Telegram this month:

I’ll never understand people who go through self-checkout line and slowly and carefully scan their items. This line is for stealing.

27 shares on WeChat this month:

I wish I were a wild horse in Kazakhstan. That would fix everything.

35 shares on Snapchat this month:

I ate my exam paper. Which means that pretty soon I’ll pass the test.

40 shares on Instagram this month:

If we breakup because you “wanna focus on school,” I better see you in Harvard.

35 shares on Twitch this month:

People ask you, “are you crazy”, and then get scared when you answer, “yes”.

39 shares on X this month:

I can’t stand when people need constant validation online. Like, comment, and retweet if you agree.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

Wait… if you’re circling back and I’m touching base, who the hell is monitoring the situation?

Someone from 🇻🇪 has viewed:

Turns out the honeymoon phase lasts forever when you pick the right partner.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

My parents still haven’t apologized for making me ugly.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has copied:

It amazes me how much exercise and extra fries sound alike.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has shared:

I hate that moment when you are tired and sleepy but as soon as you go to bed your body is like “just kidding.”

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

Discovering the Spice Girls broke up not over money and fame but lesbianism.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has copied:

A more accurate description would be ‘The Darker Web’.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

We must all do our part for the planet. The other day I unplugged a row of electric cars nobody was using.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

Yes, liquor store clerk, I do need help. But I decided to come here instead.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has shared:

My toxic trait is thinking I deserve a break after sending one email.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Snapchat:

I have a yearning disability.

Seen just now on Facebook:

If politicians can text my cell phone asking for money, I should be able to text them directly with policy suggestions.

Seen just now on Slack:

“You’re an athlete,” I whisper to myself, as I begin my third attempt to get out of the couch.

Live now on WeChat:

The man who invented autocorrect has died. Restaurant in peace.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Interviewer: “What did you learn from your previous job?” Me: “That I need a new job.”

Shared recently on Messenger:

I think I’ll just sit here and waste oxygen all day.

Just landed via Telegram:

Born to be a hater but forced to understand where you’re coming from.

Just shared via Pinterest:

If we hadn’t made them extinct, instead of Kung Fu Panda we could have had Tae Kwon Dodo.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Vote for me, I’ll cut the alphabet in half.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

The brand name Oral B is so funny to me. WTF does the B stand for?

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

He probably could have just called himself “Andre.” I think I would have figured out The Giant part on my own.

My wallet is like an onion; opening it makes me cry.

Most people think that I’m arrogant, but who cares what peasants think.

There are people who leave comments on porn videos.

Snaccident: eating a whole bag of Doritos in one sitting.

Deciding if I should heal or just give up and go completely insane.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨