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Commentary:
"Someone please start a 'Let's Not Make Things Worse Than They Already Are' Party! 🙏🎉 It's time for a change from the usual suckiness in politics! 💪😂 #NoMoreSucking"

governance, humor, invent, party, political, political party, politics, satire, should, suck

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I’m the type of husband that helps his wife look for her missing chocolate that I ate.

2 months ago

chocolate, help, husband, i, missing, relationship, snack, wife
Getting mad when an app updates and changes their format is the new “rearranged grocery store” for me.

2 months ago

annoyance, app, app update, change, changes, digital, digital annoyance, everyday, everyday life, format, format change, frustration, getting, grocery, grocery store, humor, life, mad, me, new, rearranged, store, technology, update, updates, user, user frustration
I hate taking my pants off at the dentist. So humiliating.

5 months ago

awkwardness, dentist, embarrassment, hate, humiliating, humor, i, pants, taking
I was dismayed to hear the story of Rumpelstiltskin. I had no idea he was like that outside of work.

2 months ago

character, dismay, dismayed, fairy, fairy tale, hear, humor, i, idea, outside, Rumpelstiltskin, story, surprise, tale, work
If I had money, my life would be pretty much the same, but my dogs would destroy much nicer stuff.

2 months ago

destroy, dog, dogs, humor, i, life, materialism, money, much, pets, possessions, pretty, same, stuff
I don’t know who needs to hear this, but I think people who say ‘I don’t know who needs to hear this’ know exactly who needed to hear it.

2 months ago

communication, exactly, hear, hearing, humor, i, irony, know, message, needs, people, phrase, say, think

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

92 shares on Slack this month:

I start each day assuming it will be horrible and go from there.

15 shares on Pinterest this month:

Friendly reminder that someone having a different opinion about a movie than you is a direct attack on you as a person and you should take it very personally.

83 shares on Threads this month:

Be the horrifying lore of your family’s lineage.

41 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Nothing good happens on the credit card after midnight.

30 shares on TikTok this month:

I’m either freezing, peeing, or starving.

25 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The lion is starting to concern himself with things he’s been trying to ignore.

20 shares on Snapchat this month:

If biscuits were slimming and contained every nutrient the human body needs, I’d be in terrific shape.

89 shares on Snapchat this month:

The tag on my jeans says “Relaxed” so it obviously doesn’t have children.

63 shares on Twitch this month:

The reward for doing really good work is more work.

97 shares on Messenger this month:

How does a government that takes 40% of everyone’s money end up being trillions in debt?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇬 has shared:

If kids these days had a perfume, it would be called Audacity.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has viewed:

Not only is it not Friday, but it’s not even Thursday.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

I never give second chances, just 10 and then goodbye.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

My weight loss journey is just the three hours in between meals.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has downloaded:

As highly as it’s esteemed, the Mayo Clinic still sounds like the place sick sandwiches go to get better.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has downloaded:

Cats are probably like: Oh, I should follow you on Litterboxd.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

Oh, him? He’s my insignificant other.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

Your phone is a casino designed to steal your time.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has viewed:

I am so out of shape right now, that if someone yelled “run for your life!” I’d be like “ya’ll go ahead, I’m meetin’ Jesus today!”

Someone from 🇩🇿 has bookmarked:

My Christmas letter this year includes a bonus DVD of my colonoscopy.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Discord:

Stop hating yourself for everything. Be specific.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

Adding geologist to my resume after hitting rock bottom.

Going viral on YouTube:

Sometimes you have to sit back and imagine what life could be if it wasn’t a horrifying nightmare.

Going bananas on TikTok:

I love when men go on diets they will be like “let me go for the healthy option”: the buffalo chicken quesadilla.

Going viral on Facebook:

Oh, Amazon, no. Please do not tell me how many packages I had delivered this year; that is none of my business.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Might put on a bikini and run through your DMs.

Just landed via X:

The money I made gradually, you need urgently?

Just shared via Messenger:

My husband asked me if he had any annoying habits then got offended during the PowerPoint presentation.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Quitting a job is not enough. I need them to go out of business when I leave.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

They should invent a political party that doesn’t suck.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I’m the type of husband that helps his wife look for her missing chocolate that I ate.

Getting mad when an app updates and changes their format is the new “rearranged grocery store” for me.

I hate taking my pants off at the dentist. So humiliating.

I was dismayed to hear the story of Rumpelstiltskin. I had no idea he was like that outside of work.

If I had money, my life would be pretty much the same, but my dogs would destroy much nicer stuff.

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but I think people who say ‘I don’t know who needs to hear this’ know exactly who needed to hear it.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨