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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇷 has bookmarked:

Onesies are amazing till you have to really pee in the middle of the night then you question all your life’s decisions.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has copied:

French fries are like the lifeboats on the Titanic. They never give you enough.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has bookmarked:

I put my music on shuffle then get mad when it doesn’t play the song I want.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

Life hack: You don’t need white noise to sleep when you have constant ringing in your ears.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

Roses are red, my name is not Dave, this makes no sense, microwave.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has viewed:

Make your salad taste better by putting it between bread, meat, cheese, and Big Mac sauce.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has viewed:

I don’t want to sound controversial, but having Monday off is great. We should do this every week.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

Only at 27 do you become old, and then when you turn 30, you become younger than ever. That’s just how it goes.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has bookmarked:

The Playstation is broken and the child has noticed that I live here too.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,225

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

You don’t need a therapist, you need an exorcist.

Trending via YouTube:

Valentine’s Day is a stupid and made up holiday unless someone wants to give me a present in which case I really believe in celebrating it.

Live now on Discord:

The money I made gradually, you need urgently?

Freshly posted on X:

My goal was to look good in a bikini this summer, but the call of the barbecue is stronger.

Trending via YouTube:

I’m having people over to stare at their phones later, if you want to come by.

Shared recently on WeChat:

I was having a great time until I remembered that I was ugly.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Welcome to your 40’s: it’s ten years of people saying “wait until you’re 50”.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Why fall in love when you can fall asleep?

Broadcasted on Threads:

In the event of a tornado or other such natural disaster, place wieners and/or cheese slices in your pockets, so the search dogs will find you first.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

The real body count is how many people are in therapy because of you.

We need an app where introverts can pay extroverts to make phone calls for them.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Sign me up, where's the download button for this new "Rent-a-Voice" service? 📞🤐😅

anxiety, app, call, calls, communication, extrovert, humor, interaction, introvert, need, outsourcing, pay, phone, phone call, social, social anxiety, social interaction, technology, where

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Imagine hating me and I’m just over here hating myself.

0

2 months ago

hate, here, humor, imagine, irony, just, me, myself, over, perspective, relationships, self-deprecation, self-hate
I will sit in the rain about this.

0

3 months ago

humor, i, patience, rain, sit, sitting, stubbornness, weather
Guys with grey in their beards will do that thing you like.

0

2 months ago

attraction, beard, beards, charm, dating, grey, grey beard, guy, guys, humor, relationship, thing
Pinterest is so therapeutic. There’s no drama, no one to argue with. Just pretty pictures.

0

2 months ago

activity, argue, argument, creativity, drama, fun, fun activity, just, pictures, Pinterest, pretty, relaxation, therapy
How am I supposed to relax when there are things?

0

3 months ago

am, anxiety, distraction, humor, i, procrastination, relax, stress, things
Some of you aren’t reading the room. Not even listening to the room on audiobook.

0

2 months ago

audiobook, awareness, communication, even, humor, listening, reading, room

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

91 shares on YouTube this month:

My superpower is giving you the middle finger using my eyes only.

36 shares on Slack this month:

Life is strange. We come into the world with nothing, then we struggle for everything, and finally, we leave with nothing.

92 shares on YouTube this month:

If it was really a smart phone, it would have recognize that it was an ignored call, not missed.

33 shares on WeChat this month:

Just had a fight with every item in my closet. They started it.

68 shares on Reddit this month:

I’m not actively avoiding you. I don’t actively do anything.

81 shares on Discord this month:

Dr. Pepper just unseated Pepsi as the second most popular soda in America. Don’t tell me that getting your PhD isn’t worth it.

90 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Tonight I wanted to stop drinking but then I remembered the owner of the pub has a family to feed.

91 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The worst thing you can do while cleaning is sit down for a minute.

42 shares on Facebook this month:

Discovered a new coping mechanism called lashing out and making your loved ones resent you.

30 shares on Pinterest this month:

That awkward moment when you leave a store without buying anything, and all you can think is: “Act normal, you are innocent.”

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

I take issue with furniture that deliberately moves 1 inch when you’re in a rush to get by.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has viewed:

If you respond, “A reason for living,” when a store employee asks if they can help you find something, they will leave you alone.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has shared:

WFH is so great until you realize you’ve walked about 17 steps all day.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

A DM? Flirt on the timeline like a real man.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

Perks of being ugly: phone battery lasts longer.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing?

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

Birthday sex is having sex to celebrate your parents having sex.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has downloaded:

My CV is so good, companies are still reading it for 9 months.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

My biggest sexual fantasy is someone throwing a million dollars on my naked body and then leaving me alone.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

I don’t freak out until I see the Buddhists freaking out.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Reddit:

I love coming home and being at home and sitting inside my home and staying home.

Making waves on X:

There are people on TV who are not ruined by fame, but who ruin fame.

Trending via Snapchat:

Y’all are single because y’all are looking for 90’s love in this sick generation.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Handshakes should be banned. Touch our naked body parts together for all the world to see? Gross!

Just landed via Threads:

When God closes a door, he opens a window. Unfortunately, we are in a submarine.

Breaking via Messenger:

I’m putting free wifi on my gravestone, so people will come visit me.

Live now on Instagram:

I’m really glad that light only attracts insects. Imagine wild boars would come knocking at your windows all the time.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

Your honor, I was in my villain era at the time of those incidents.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Labubu?! Sounds like a name picked mid-sneeze!

Broadcasted on Discord:

“I’m disgusted by how many of you still use Spotify. I use a fair trade, ethically conscientious mom-and-pop platform called Apple Music.”

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

We need an app where introverts can pay extroverts to make phone calls for them.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Imagine hating me and I’m just over here hating myself.

I will sit in the rain about this.

Guys with grey in their beards will do that thing you like.

Pinterest is so therapeutic. There’s no drama, no one to argue with. Just pretty pictures.

How am I supposed to relax when there are things?

Some of you aren’t reading the room. Not even listening to the room on audiobook.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨