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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

I’m afraid that AI will quickly realize that the biggest problem on Earth is humans – and then solve the problem.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has shared:

When I moved into my new igloo, my friends threw me a surprise housewarming party. Now I’m homeless.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has copied:

How bad can a decision really be if nobody from the future shows up to stop you?

Someone from 🇸🇦 has shared:

Tweeting with no audience feels like screaming jokes into a cornfield.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

I hope this is the year my teen learns how to turn off a light when she leaves a room.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

If you don’t like sports, you are missing a whole world of easy-going conversations with complete strangers.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

The Bloodhound Gang were very special because its music for 12-year-old boys, but every reference requires you to be 40 years old.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

494 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,087

Funny Quotes Topics

17,241

Funny Quotes Images

15,087

Updated

Dec 19, 2025

Users Online

3,634

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Facebook:

I don’t need therapy. I need everyone who’s ever wronged me to suddenly feel a chill and not know why.

Going viral on YouTube:

Did you ever buy a pack of underwear, take them out, and think, wow, these are huge… then try them on, and they fit perfectly?

Just landed via Threads:

They’re making me do work at work.

Trending via Discord:

Sorry I’m late. The door said PULL, but I don’t believe everything I read.

Just landed via Messenger:

I do my best to kill everyone with kindness, but they don’t seem to be dying.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

It’s interesting growing up and discovering that most adults are not that clever. I had my suspicions as a kid but I didn’t think the situation was this dire.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Do you mind if I wear my black T-shirt covered in pet hair to your fine dining establishment?

What if the universe wasn’t infinite or finite, but a secret third thing?

5 months ago

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Commentary:
Mind blown 🤯! Maybe the universe is actually just shy and hiding its true self behind cosmic sunglasses 🕶️✨.

finite, humor, infinite, mystery, paradox, philosophy, secret, thing, third, universe

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Behind every funny man is a woman who rolls her eyes.

1 month ago

comedy, every, eyes, funny man, humor, man, relationship, rolls, rolls eyes, wit, woman
Born to say “are you f*****g stupid”, forced to say “wow, I’ve never thought about it like that before”.

2 months ago

before, born, comedy, conversation, disbelief, frustration, honesty, humor, irony, never, sarcasm, say, stupid, thought
Deleting the paragraph you wrote and texting back “ok” is a different type of self-control.

1 month ago

back, behavior, communication, deleting, different, digital, digital behavior, etiquette, humor, interaction, ok, paragraph, self-control, social, social interaction, texting, texting etiquette, type
Pro tip: Avoid the news for a couple of days and have some fun.

5 months ago

advice, avoid, break, couple, days, fun, news, pro, pro-tip, relaxation, tip
People be like “bear with me” and they don’t even have a bear with them.

1 month ago

bear, even, humor, irony, me, patience, people
On the whole, people are getting smarter. I remember when they had to put “The End” on the screen, so people would know the movie was over.

1 month ago

end, entertainment, getting, humor, i, irony, know, movie, nostalgia, observation, over, people, put, remember, screen, smart, smarter, whole

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇳 has bookmarked:

My husband and I fell in love at first sight. Maybe I should have taken a second look.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has viewed:

Serious replies to silly posts are now illegal. Go talk to your wife.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has downloaded:

Not gonna lie, the age I’m turning this year sounds a little serious, and I don’t like it.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has downloaded:

Saying “sounds good to me” in a meeting then quickly realizing a lot more was expected from you.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

When someone giving me directions says, “You can’t miss it,” I would love to tell them just how wrong they were if I could find my way back to them.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

What did parents do before smart phones, hold their babies with two hands or something?

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

I don’t mind pulling your cart — I’ve been chasing the carrot anyway, and it’s in the same direction.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

They should invent a rest for the wicked.

Live now on Instagram:

I am not “quiet quitting”, I am suffering from third-degree burnout.

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What if the universe wasn’t infinite or finite, but a secret third thing?

Behind every funny man is a woman who rolls her eyes.

Born to say “are you f*****g stupid”, forced to say “wow, I’ve never thought about it like that before”.

Pro tip: Avoid the news for a couple of days and have some fun.

People be like “bear with me” and they don’t even have a bear with them.

On the whole, people are getting smarter. I remember when they had to put “The End” on the screen, so people would know the movie was over.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Me in hell: “So did it hurt when you fell from heaven.” Lucifer: “Get out!”

Not to brag, but I just stood up without making a sound. Don’t be jealous.

Telling my coworkers I can’t talk in meetings today because I need to save my voice for concerts this weekend.

The art of today’s art is to persuade people that it’s art.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Getting a boner because the Lego instructions are telling me what to do.

I think we just need to accept that the 90’s was our peak as a species.

The older I get, the more I respect Sleeping Beauty. She took one look at the world and said, “Nah.”

The dragon with the girl tattoo.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Oh, you like NYC? Name every rat.

If we all club together we could raise enough money to buy Monday and have it destroyed.

“You don’t look 40.” How am I supposed to look?

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

It’s Monday, proceed with caution.

Saturday Night Fever, but it’s just me yelling, “Five, six, seven, eight!” while my cat lies down and refuses to participate.

I’ve got the nativity scene facing the TV, so baby Jesus can watch “Die Hard.”

Can’t be sexting when you’re somewhat articulate. You just sound like a vampire.

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What if the universe wasn’t infinite or finite, but a secret third thing?

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Behind every funny man is a woman who rolls her eyes.

Born to say “are you f*****g stupid”, forced to say “wow, I’ve never thought about it like that before”.

Deleting the paragraph you wrote and texting back “ok” is a different type of self-control.

Pro tip: Avoid the news for a couple of days and have some fun.

People be like “bear with me” and they don’t even have a bear with them.

On the whole, people are getting smarter. I remember when they had to put “The End” on the screen, so people would know the movie was over.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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