Someone from 🇰🇪 has bookmarked:

My employer is totally caring. They pay so poorly that I can’t afford to have an alcohol or drug problem.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has downloaded:

Beginning my getting out of bed journey this morning.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

I’m heading to the beach without a beach body.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

You ever wake up in the morning and your first thought is ‘I can’t wait to go to bed tonight’?

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

If anyone is still on Facebook, please check on my parents.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has downloaded:

My kids acting shocked there’s ants in my car like they’re not Hansel and Gretel leaving bloody crumb trails.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

I’m accused of being a plagiarist. Their words, not mine.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

The dildo of consequences rarely arrives lubed.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has shared:

Why do we call it tuna fish? Is there any other tuna out there that’s not a fish?

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

I love how spring sprung and then disappeared again.