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Commentary:
"Your honor, forget the verdict, let's focus on the real MVP here – the brownie maker extraordinaire! 🍫👩‍⚖️ Courtrooms could definitely use more sweet treats and less legal jargon! Who needs justice when you have brownies, am I right? 😜 #BrowniesForJustice"

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I like my job, but if I had the opportunity to become a rich housewife, I would take it.

1 month ago
career, choices, desires, housewife, humor, i, job, life, life choices, opportunity, rich, take
When someone asks why you don’t have kids just say “dingoes”.

1 month ago
ding, excuse, humor, just, kids, parenting, response, say, someone
Just once, I’d love to underthink a situation.

1 month ago
anxiety, humor, ID, just, life, life situation, love, mindset, once, overthinking, situation, thought, underthink, wish
A sandwich has the power to change your entire life.

1 month ago
change, food, humor, life, perspective, power, sandwich
“I’m getting to an age where I realize I shouldn’t have laughed at my grandparents for having an ‘upstairs’ vacuum.”

1 month ago
age, getting, grandparent, grandparents, having, humor, i, nostalgia, realization, realize, upstairs, vacuum, where
Off to my crying appointment (therapy).

1 month ago
appointment, care, crying, health, humor, mental, mental health, self, self-care, therapy

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇶🇦 has downloaded:

College is not even mentioned once in the Bible. Somebody get me outta here.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

If the universe is continuing to expand then why does my rent keep going up?

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

I don’t always carry all the groceries on one arm, but when I do, my keys are in the wrong pocket.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has bookmarked:

Ever since I was a little girl, I have loved staying up really late, hanging out with myself, and thinking about stuff and things.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has viewed:

Maybe somewhere in a parallel universe, I wake up feeling refreshed and energetic each day.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

“I’m not afraid to admit when I’m wrong. For example, I thought it was a good idea to leave the house today, which, as it turns out, was a terrible mistake.”

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

Yeah, the planet is dying. The government hates us. The animals are leaving. The aliens aren’t contacting us. We might be alone. It just might be you and me.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via YouTube:

Long sandwiches should have suitcase handles.

Spotted on YouTube:

I am so lucky that I can’t tell the difference between a heartfelt compliment and sarcastic disdain. Life is much easier when you’re dumb.

Just landed via TikTok:

A garlic a day keeps people away.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Blocking isn’t enough, I hope your pillow never has a cold side.

Going viral on Messenger:

Burger King implies the existence of an entire burger based feudal system.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Sometimes I just say “no idea” because I’m too lazy to think.

Trending via WhatsApp:

When physical labor became optional, we invented the gym. We’ll need the same thing for the mind.

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Activity Log ✨

Your honor, if it pleases the court, I brought homemade brownies for everyone.

I like my job, but if I had the opportunity to become a rich housewife, I would take it.

When someone asks why you don’t have kids just say “dingoes”.

Just once, I’d love to underthink a situation.

A sandwich has the power to change your entire life.

“I’m getting to an age where I realize I shouldn’t have laughed at my grandparents for having an ‘upstairs’ vacuum.”

Off to my crying appointment (therapy).

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Getting older just means that you have to start eating all the sad foods.

A word to the wise ain’t necessary, it’s the stupid ones who need advice.

Did you guys know that you can actually do whatever you want all the time?

People need to understand the difference between want and need. Like, I want abs, but I need chocolate.

Everybody say a little prayer for my husband, he just told me to calm down.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Yeah, the planet is dying. The government hates us. The animals are leaving. The aliens aren’t contacting us. We might be alone. It just might be you and me.

The ‘b’ in ‘subtle’ totally is.

Nothing makes me feel more powerful than when I write ‘furthermore’ in an email.

Can someone please invent 8 hours between 9 p.m. and midnight?

Me: trying to rest. Earthquake: Let’s make that a no.

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

This time last night, there was a spider so big in my bathroom it put me under a glass on a postcard and carried me out.

Hiring a mortician to do my makeup while I sleep.

Odd—my boss told me to meet him at the abandoned quarry at midnight for my performance evaluation.

Sorry I was late, I was disassociating in the shower.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

If the universe is continuing to expand then why does my rent keep going up?

People who live in glass houses shouldn’t change clothes.

“Never let someone else destroy your stuff when you can destroy it yourself”, every kid I ever.

Apologies for the late response, instead of spending three minutes answering your email, I ignored it and felt anxious for two weeks.

You are born, you lie about how you are and then you die.

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Your honor, if it pleases the court, I brought homemade brownies for everyone.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I like my job, but if I had the opportunity to become a rich housewife, I would take it.

When someone asks why you don’t have kids just say “dingoes”.

Just once, I’d love to underthink a situation.

A sandwich has the power to change your entire life.

“I’m getting to an age where I realize I shouldn’t have laughed at my grandparents for having an ‘upstairs’ vacuum.”

Off to my crying appointment (therapy).

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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