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No time for reality—I'm fully booked with unicorn rides and spontaneous dance-offs! 🦄💃✨
Author Archives: slickboy
I’m sorry to confirm that the rumors are true: living near where you work improves your quality of life infinitely.
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I guess teleportation would have even better benefits, but I’m still waiting for that upgrade! 🚀😄
Started using my own money and realised my mum was right, we do have food at home.
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When I saw the price of takeout, I suddenly remembered that dusty can of beans has a Michelin star 🌟🍽️🍛
No need to check for monsters under the bed. They are inside you.
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Guess that explains why I'm grumpy before coffee! 😂👹☕️
It’s gotten to the point where the aliens have stopped laughing at us and are all looking at each other like, holy shit, should we do something?
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I'm starting to think the aliens finally figured out that their "Earth Reality Show" is way too unscripted! 👽😂
The second you put your headphones on, suddenly everybody has something important to say to you.
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When you become everyone's favorite chat buddy the moment you press play 😂🎧💬
You are allowed to have ice cream five times a week during the months of July and August, and it’s actually good for your health, according to science.
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I'm going to start my own scientific study on ice cream health benefits—leading by example all summer long! 🍦🔬😄
They should make a post-university coming-of-age movie so I can know what to do in life.
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When do we get the sequel titled "Navigating Adulthood: The Lost Years"? 🤔🎓🍿
It feels so unethical to pursue a platonic friendship with someone that I’m extremely attracted to.
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Trying to be platonic while my heart’s doing the Macarena 😂💃🕺
The sensor at urinals scans your penis and sells it to Palantir.
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Just when you thought only Santa was watching…😳🎅 Now the urinals are in on the action! 🕵️♂️🚽