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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

If history repeats itself, I’m getting a pet dinosaur.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

I wasn’t feeling well so I googled my symptoms. I either have allergies or I died two days ago.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

Surround yourself with people who google the menu of the restaurant beforehand.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has shared:

“You never text back.” No, I be reading texts from the notification bar, then forget to text back.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has bookmarked:

Can’t stand British posts on my timeline. “I bought this for four squids and a halfpenny!” What the hell are you talking about?

Someone from 🇲🇲 has copied:

Your future doctor is using ChatGPT to pass med school so you better start eating healthy.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has viewed:

They should invent a self-checkout where someone else scans the items and puts them in a bag.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

3,978

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via X:

There are people who leave comments on porn videos.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Sometimes, fasting from people is also important.

Making waves on Messenger:

“I’m depressed because there’s not enough cheese in this world to satisfy my hunger for it.”

Spotted on Telegram:

Spiraling out of control if anyone wants anything.

Going viral on X:

Some things are better left alone, like me, for instance.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Girls these days are like a box of chocolates. Some have nuts.

Seen just now on Facebook:

They call it a coffin because they’re finally coughing up that inheritance.

Blocking isn’t enough, I hope your pillow never has a cold side.

1 month ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"May your pillow forever stay cool, and your enemies forever feel the heat of a warm pillow. 😂🛌 #ColdSideBurn"

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

You ever met someone so dumb you gotta take a deep breath before responding to them?

1 month ago
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Friendly reminder that someone having a different opinion about a movie than you is a direct attack on you as a person and you should take it very personally.

1 month ago
attack, different, direct, disagreement, feelings, friendly, having, humor, movie, opinion, person, personal, perspective, reminder, sarcasm, should, someone, take
They should send the Epstein list to everyone’s phones like that U2 album.

5 months ago
album, commentary, conspiracy, Epstein, humor, list, music, phone, phones, send, should, social, social commentary, u2, U2 album
I didn’t lose a girlfriend, I gained an enemy.

1 month ago
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Fun Fact: Dove chocolate tastes way better than their soap.

1 month ago
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It’s fun getting room service. I just love eating a $19 hamburger at a desk in front of a mirror.

1 month ago
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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

Robot bartender rips me in half after listening to my problems for over an hour.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

Life is so dull when you don’t have someone to flirt with.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

Any house is an Airbnb if you’re quiet enough.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

The fun thing about Airbnb is that you get to clean someone else’s house on your vacation.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has downloaded:

I bought some old lady reading glasses as a lark, a laugh, and now my eyes don’t hurt. This isn’t what I wanted.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

Trying to work outside on a laptop is like sunbathing on a melting ice cube.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has downloaded:

Water is a drink whose flavor is its temperature.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Discord:

Not the sharpest cheddar on the charcuterie board.

Seen just now on YouTube:

If you’re happy and you know it, keep it to yourself. No one likes a braggart.

Shared recently on Discord:

The most dangerous drinking game I play, is seeing how long I can go without coffee.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Ladies, repeat after me: “I was wrong and I am sorry!”

Seen just now on Twitch:

Men be like, “I want you.” Yeah, to suffer.

Making waves on Discord:

If the number 666 is considered evil, then technically, 25.8069758 is the root of all evil.

Shared recently on Facebook:

I have a date and nothing to wear. Or as Nietzsche said: If you stare into a closet long enough, the closet stares back at you.

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Activity Log ✨

Blocking isn’t enough, I hope your pillow never has a cold side.

You ever met someone so dumb you gotta take a deep breath before responding to them?

Friendly reminder that someone having a different opinion about a movie than you is a direct attack on you as a person and you should take it very personally.

I didn’t lose a girlfriend, I gained an enemy.

Fun Fact: Dove chocolate tastes way better than their soap.

It’s fun getting room service. I just love eating a $19 hamburger at a desk in front of a mirror.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Parallel parking: where true relationships are tested!

Jewelry stores should just be like: Whether you’re trying to be nice or trying to get laid, we got you covered.

I’m too tired to shower. Anyone want to wash my back?

I don’t understand why judges get paid so much, others judge me for free.

Wine drunk doesn’t even make itself known. You’re just relaxed, and then, all of a sudden, you feel sexier.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

The voodoo magic of a tranquil night’s sleep

Maybe somewhere in a parallel universe, I wake up feeling refreshed and energetic each day.

Channeling my inner forest ghost: hauntingly fabulous and slightly lost.

My spirit animal is a sloth on its fourth nap of the day!

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Congratulations on angrily speeding past me to get to the red light first. You’re special.

There’s nothing better than knowing that you don’t have to set an alarm clock for the next day.

Waiting patiently for the alien invasion.

No one is shocked when a defibrillator doesn’t work.

Festival is when you pay a fortune to live like a homeless person.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

I’m not addicted to coffee. We’re just very close.

The second date is you watching me parallel park and trying not to have a stroke.

Snaccident: eating a whole bag of Doritos in one sitting.

Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it most never use it.

I would like to opt out of WW3, por favor.

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Blocking isn’t enough, I hope your pillow never has a cold side.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

You ever met someone so dumb you gotta take a deep breath before responding to them?

Friendly reminder that someone having a different opinion about a movie than you is a direct attack on you as a person and you should take it very personally.

They should send the Epstein list to everyone’s phones like that U2 album.

I didn’t lose a girlfriend, I gained an enemy.

Fun Fact: Dove chocolate tastes way better than their soap.

It’s fun getting room service. I just love eating a $19 hamburger at a desk in front of a mirror.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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