Commentary:
Looks like true love and urban planning are the new dynamic duo 🍷💑🚶♂️🌆
89 Funny addiction quotes
Cocaine is God’s way of telling you that you make too much money.
Commentary:
Sounds like I need a raise in divine intervention! 💸😇
Checking my iced coffee rewards points like it’s my 401k.
Commentary:
When caffeine becomes your financial planner! ☕💸😅
Why is smoking the only addiction jobs give you breaks to do? I should get 15 minutes every hour to cook up some parlays.
Commentary:
Trying to explain to my boss why I need a break to strategize my snack heists, but they’re just not nibbling… 🥨🥷⌛
I’ll stop smoking weed when life stops smoking me.
Commentary:
Trying to quit, but life keeps offering me a light. 😂💨
Dating these days is like trusting a crackhead to come back with your change.
Commentary:
When your date asks if you want to split the bill, just remember: trust is in the air… or is that just broken promises? 🤔💸😂
By 30, you should have settled down with an addiction that works for your lifestyle, no second guessing. You go to work, come home, and [addiction].
Commentary:
Looks like my addiction to procrastination is right on track! 😅🛋️⏰
Microdosing hell by checking the web every day.
Commentary:
Feeling edgy? Just browsing the web – it's like dipping your toes into the chaos pool! 🔥😂📱
How many cups of coffee is OK to have every day? Is it eight? I’m pretty sure it’s eight.
Commentary:
Counting coffee in single digits feels too modest. I'm sure it's just an infinite loop with extra pep! ☕️😄🔄
Feeling morally and spiritually adrift without a Sunday HBO show.
Commentary:
Trying to find my life purpose one HBO show at a time 📺😇 #SundaySavior