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31 Funny belief quotes

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  • With all the fake information out there, I refuse to believe scales or mirrors.

    Commentary:
    “Who needs scales or mirrors when you’ve got denial and self-deception on your side? 🙈🤷‍♂️ #FakeItTillYouMakeIt”

  • The only thing Flat Earthers have to fear is sphere itself.

    Commentary:
    “Unraveling the mysteries of the universe, one flat theory at a time! 🌎🔵 Who knew a simple shape could cause such a stir among the Flat Earthers? Watch out, the sphere is coming to get ya! 😄 #RoundAndRoundWeGo”

  • I forgot to turn my clocks back and, oh my God, you guys are not going to believe the stuff that happens in the next hour.

    Commentary:
    “Looks like someone’s in for a rollercoaster ride through time! 🕰️⏰ Get ready for unexpected plot twists and hilarious shenanigans in the blink of an eye! Buckle up, because who knows what wild adventures await in the ‘Twilight Zone’ of one forgotten hour ahead! ⏳😄 #TimeTravelAntics”

  • If you think someone has put a spell on you, send me $500 and I’ll get rid of it.

    Commentary:
    🔮💸 “If you suspect someone’s been dabbling in the dark arts, just swipe $500 my way and I’ll wave my magic credit card to banish that spell! ✨💳 Who needs potions and incantations when you have the power of money, am I right? 😂💸”

  • I believe in you. I also believe in Bigfoot so don’t get too excited.

    Commentary:
    “Remember, I believe in you… just like I believe in Bigfoot! 🌲🦶 Don’t let that mythic confidence boost go to your head now! 😄”

  • I asked my boyfriend if he believed in trolls and elves and he said, “slightly.”

    Commentary:
    Looks like there’s a bit of magic and mischief in the air! 🧝‍♂️✨ Who knew believing in trolls and elves could come with a side of skepticism? Maybe he just needs more convincing spells and proof from the enchanted forest! 🌿😄 #MagicAndSkepticism

  • People believe that they have brains but maybe that’s just inside their heads.

    Commentary:
    “Are brains really just a head-scratcher? 🤔 Maybe it’s all in our heads after all! 🧠😆”

  • Pharaohs were buried with their hands crossed over their chest because of the belief there would be countless water slides in the after life.

    Commentary:
    “Seems like even ancient rulers couldn’t resist the allure of a good water slide! 🌊👑 Just imagine the Pharaohs slipping and sliding their way into eternity, ready for a splash-tacular afterlife adventure! 💦 Who knew the pyramids were actually ancient water parks in disguise? 🏰🌈 #WaterslidesOfTheNile”

  • My sneeze is the reason people in the middle ages believed sneezing was caused by demon possession.

    Commentary:
    Ah-choo! 😈 Beware my sneezes, for they are so powerful that they could summon demons from the depths of the Middle Ages! 👻 Who knew my nasal exorcism skills were so legendary? 🤧 #SneezeGoals #PossessedByDemons

  • And no thanking Jesus unless he actually shows up at the ceremony.

    Commentary:
    “Looks like Jesus is not RSVP-ing to this event! He must be too busy turning water into wine or parting the seas 🍷🌊 Let’s keep the thank-yous Earth-bound for now 😉🌍”

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