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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇾 has bookmarked:

It’s almost time to pack away the black summer clothes and unpack the black winter clothes.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

Second day without coffee. I can no longer hear out of my left eye.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

Does anyone know if it’s possible to buy the transcripts of audiobooks? Thanks!

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

Stay humble, you are someone’s weird coworker.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has viewed:

All these laws are really getting in the way of my driving.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has copied:

Americans be like, “MM:DD:YY” is how you say dates verbally, and then have a national holiday called “4th of July.”

Someone from 🇸🇻 has copied:

Dating is just wondering why someone is single and then slowly figuring it out.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

I like the concept of restaurant appetizers: “Bring me something to eat. And bring me something else to eat while I’m waiting.”

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

I don’t dress for women. I don’t dress for men. I dress for the weather, mainly.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I hate the sounds you make when you chew.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

801 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,963

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,963

34 minutes ago

3,443

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Telegram:

Debugging is like being the detective in a crime where you are also the murderer. Following the clues of an idiot.

Making waves on YouTube:

Somewhere on our planet, there is someone who doesn’t care about you at this moment. It could be billions.

Live now on YouTube:

Whoever is dating my ex, all I can say is: cheat first!

Freshly posted on Slack:

Nature is fascinating. A dandelion makes it through concrete, while I get my head stuck in my sweater in the morning.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Everyone who dramatically ‘quits’ social media is back in 48 hours like it was just a trial separation.

Spotted on Discord:

I googled my symptoms and it turns out I just need this election to be over.

Spotted on Discord:

I’m forced to conclude that not liking my posts is a you problem.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Has anyone ever died from waiting for a group of people to decide what they want to eat.

Going viral on Pinterest:

My summer body is just my winter body with better lighting.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Australia is like someone’s still playing Jumanji.

Home » Funny Food Quotes » Page 74

733 Funny food quotes

More funny food quotes 👇

6 months ago
Share →: I wonder if it’s possible to swim from one end to the other in a pool filled with mashed potatoes.

Commentary:
Well, that would be quite the starch-tacular challenge! 🏊‍♂️ Just imagine the creamy strokes and gravy turns you'd have to master. 💪 Swim-a-licious or mash madness, you decide! 🥔 #SpudtasticAdventure
6 months ago
Share →: Diet day #1: All the unhealthy food has been removed from the house. It was delicious.

Commentary:
"Diet day #1: Saying goodbye to all the tempting treats like a true warrior… and by 'goodbye', I mean 'see you later, when I sneak out for a midnight snack.' 🍔🍩🏃‍♂️ #HealthyChoices #FoodStruggles"
6 months ago
Share →: My dogs have learned that whenever they hear the f-word in the kitchen, there’s now food on the floor.

Commentary:
Looks like these savvy pups have cracked the code to getting extra treats! 🐶🤣 Who knew the "f-word" in the kitchen could lead to such tasty rewards? Time to hire them as kitchen assistants, right? 😉🍗

For even more funny food quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

801 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,963

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,963

34 minutes ago

3,434

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

I bought a book on Feng Shui, but I don’t know where to put it.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

It’s that time of year again where I go to random restaurants to tell random women, “So this is why you cancelled our date?”, while they’re out with their significant others.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

In America we have marijuana. In France they have oui’d.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

When God created the giraffe, he probably slipped with the mouse on the screen. This is how its neck was created.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

Ah coffee. The sweet balm by which we shall accomplish today’s tasks.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

The worst part of marriage is when you do something stupid, the best part of marriage is when your partner does something stupid.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has bookmarked:

The paintings I always like the most in museums are the ones that have a bench.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has bookmarked:

The best part about getting added to a group chat is leaving two weeks later.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has viewed:

There’s a famous ancient Chinese proverb, but it’s written in Chinese so I have no idea what it says.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has downloaded:

Doing my bit for the evolution of the human race by eating lots of carbs and never exercising. We will adapt!

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Instagram:

A bathrobe is being naked with plausible deniability and pockets.

Spotted on Twitch:

How much chocolate is too much chocolate before it is technically no longer a salad?

Just shared via Discord:

People pass a joint around like it’s no big deal, but the minute I ask someone to do that with their Subway sandwich, I’m a weirdo.

Trending via Slack:

Why did they have to bleep out everything R2D2 said?

Just shared via Slack:

I’m not starting a presentation with “ladies and gentlemen”, I’m using the gender neutral “to those who heed my warnings”.

Just shared via Reddit:

If you bring an acoustic guitar to a bonfire, I’m going to assume it’s for fuel.

Live now on WhatsApp:

Looking forward to eight hours of trying to get four hours of sleep tonight.

Seen just now on Messenger:

I look like a casual, laid-back guy, but it’s like a circus in my head.

Trending via Snapchat:

Stephen King’s It is the bone chilling story about adults who are forced to spend time with their childhood friends.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Bartenders be like “here’s that receipt, I’ll go ahead and put it on the wettest part of the bar”.

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