Wordgag ツ

4 months ago
Share →: The older I get, the more I treat birthdays like one-night stands and just pretend they didn’t happen.

Commentary:
"Birthdays and one-night stands – both can leave you feeling a bit disoriented the next morning! 🎉💔 Just brush off those pesky numbers like last night's regrettable choice and carry on ✨🥳"
4 months ago
Share →: Finally it’s Friday and I can go out. I’m putting the garbage out and I’ll be right back.

Commentary:
🎉 TGIF! Time to take out the trash… both literally and figuratively! 😂 Remember, one man's trash is another man's treasure… or in this case, just plain trash. Enjoy your Friday night escapades and don't forget to put yourself out there too! 🗑️💃 #TGIF #TrashTalk
$Funny fun quotes - You can either have a nice evening or you can help your child with their math homework. You can’t have both.$

4 months ago
Share →: You can either have a nice evening or you can help your child with their math homework. You can’t have both.

Commentary:
"When you have to choose between a relaxing evening and diving headfirst into the world of fractions and long division…well, there goes the peace ☕📚🤯 #ParentingStruggles #MathMadness"
4 months ago
Share →: Terrible things can happen if you go camping. For starters, you could want to go camping again.

Commentary:
Ah, camping: where you exchange the comfort of your bed for the thrill of battling the elements with nothing but a flimsy tent and a bag of marshmallows. ⛺️🔥 Brace yourself for the inevitable post-camping blues, where you find yourself longing for bug bites, burnt s'mores, and the great outdoors… until you remember the lack of hot showers. Let's just say, camping may leave you questioning your own sanity, but hey, at least it
4 months ago
Share →: I dare you to try and be more single than me.

Commentary:
"Challenge accepted! I am so single, my plants ask me for dating advice 🪴😂 #AllTheSingleLadies 💁‍♀️"
4 months ago
Share →: Let’s play a game called you bring me food and I eat it.

Commentary:
"Ah, a classic game of sustenance and satisfaction! It's all fun and games until someone brings too many snacks and forgets the pants with an elastic waistband. 🍔🎮 #FoodieLife"
4 months ago
Share →: Whatever you do today, do it with the confidence of a 4-year old wearing a Batman cape.

Commentary:
"Today's motto: Be as bold and fearless as a 4-year old rocking a Batman cape! 💪🦇 Just remember, confidence is key… and maybe a cape too! 😄 #UnleashYourInnerSuperhero"
4 months ago
Share →: In my experience, bowling and pancakes have the same energy. High hopes at the beginning, lowered self-esteem at the end.

Commentary:
🎳🥞 "Bowling and pancakes: where the strikes are just as elusive as the perfectly flipped pancake. It's all fun and games until reality hits you in the gutter. Keep rolling those balls and flipping those flapjacks – maybe one day you'll strike gold (or at least brunch)." 🎳🥞
4 months ago
Share →: Shopping is the only exercise I need.

Commentary:
"Who needs squats when you can lift shopping bags? 💪🛍️ Maybe they should add 'retail therapy' to the workout routine! 😂 #ShopTillYouDrop"
4 months ago
Share →: If you are lonely, dim all the lights and put on a horror movie. You won’t feel like you are lonely any more.

Commentary:
"Who needs a cuddle buddy when you have creepy creatures lurking in the shadows? Let the monster under the bed keep you company tonight! 🌌👻 #LonelyButSpooky"