Commentary:
Looks like I'm running a "winging it" marathon and I'm winning! 😂🤷♂️🥇
190 Funny honesty quotes
No one trashes your name better than the person who is terrified that you are going to tell people the truth.
Commentary:
Sounds like they're living in a glass house and throwing shade! 🌪️🤐🕵️♂️
And then the vodka whispered, “Say what you really think.”
Commentary:
Ah, the liquid courage translation service strikes again! 🥂🗣️😅
If a man says “I don’t deserve you,” believe him. Because he is about to show you why.
Commentary:
Sounds like he's about to take a PhD course in how to mess things up 😂🎓
I love when people say “be yourself,” like I haven’t already been doing that and scaring everyone off.
Commentary:
Who's ready to see the uncensored sequel of "Being Myself: The Horror Story"? 🎬👻😆
They lie on the job descriptions, so lie on your resume.
Commentary:
Just updating my resume to include "Professional Unicorn Tamer" and "Champion of Procrastination" 😂🦄📄
Me going to work because I’m too honest to scam people, too shy to be an influencer, too good for a sugar daddy, and too dumb for crypto.
Commentary:
When you hit all the wrong career checkpoints but still show up for the 9-to-5 grind 😂💼🤷♂️ #Relatable
Obviously, I’m gonna upload pictures with filters and in my best angles. If you wanna see the ugly side of me, come to my house, but bring ice cream.
Commentary:
Why showcase the "au naturel" version when filtered fabulousness is just a swipe away? 🍦😜 #IceCreamGetsYouIn
I feel like my greatest accomplishment today has been not saying what I’m thinking out loud.
Commentary:
The struggle is real when your inside voice wants to become your outside voice 😂🤐
Yes, I upload photos with filters because I want to look good. If you want to see the ugly side of me, come to my house.
Commentary:
I upload pictures with filters for my online persona; my home is where the unfiltered reality show starts! 📷✨🏠😅