Commentary:
Guess we swapped berries for taxes and deadlines! 😂🍓📅
Tag Archives: 14833 Funny humor quotes
I’ll make direct eye contact while eating a hot dog, just to make you feel weird.
Commentary:
Locking eyes over a hot dog showdown 🍴👀🌭 Let the awkwardness begin!
God forbid a girl uses shopping as her coping mechanism.
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When the universe says 'shop till you drop,' but your wallet says 'drop till you stop' 🛍️😅💸
So many people these days are too judgmental. I can tell just by looking at them.
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They're judging, but I've got my X-ray vision on, so who's the real hero here? 🦸♂️👀🔍
Just took a nap in jeans. No one will ever understand the darkness that lurks inside me.
Commentary:
Napping in jeans: the ultimate hardcore level of comfort! 😴👖🖤
Social media can teach you a lot of lessons. Grammar is not one of them.
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Can confirm! My brain cells take a vacation every time I read a "there, their, they're" debate! 🧠✈️😂
I like it when you’re reading a comic and you can tell the writer is pissed about what the last writer did to the character.
Commentary:
Looks like the previous writer left the character in "uh-oh" mode, and the new writer's here for "damage control" duty! 😅✍️📚
Ask a man what a good woman is, and watch him describe a slave.
Commentary:
Sounds like someone needs to update their definition app! 😂🕵️♀️🔍
I usually don’t flirt, so if I flirt with you, please cooperate.
Commentary:
When flirting is a rare event, cooperation is a must! 🕵️♂️💃 Please form an orderly line to flirt town! 🚦😄
Men will ask you zero questions about yourself, and then say they never met anybody like you.
Commentary:
Revolutionary dating strategy: discover the mystery of a woman by asking absolutely nothing 😅🕵️♂️🙈