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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇱 has downloaded:

I don’t drink coffee all the time. I take breaks in between to make another one.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

If I ever go missing, check the snack aisle. I’m probably just deciding.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has copied:

All I want is to live well and to die in a manner so bizarre and gruesome it can only be described with a German word.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

The plant app says that I either watered my plant too much or not enough. Very helpful. Thanks!

Someone from 🇸🇦 has viewed:

Manipulative people really be like “oh, so now I’m the bad guy for being the bad guy?”

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

Nothing more humbling than being at a karaoke birthday party with a bunch of singers.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has viewed:

Me, adding fuel to the fire: I’m just here to help.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

Whenever an insect rides for miles on my car, I imagine it thinking: “Oh crap, moving again!”

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

The fastest mammal on earth is the smartass on the web.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has downloaded:

No one buys my theory that red fire hydrants are filled with ketchup and yellow fire hydrants are filled with mustard.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1817 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,979

Funny Quotes Topics

14,787

Funny Quotes Images

11,979

53 seconds ago

3,441

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Telegram:

Now if you’ll excuse me, today’s bad decisions aren’t going to make themselves.

Spotted on YouTube:

Nothing is worse than seeing a gorgeous girl that I’d never approach or stand a chance with and then finding out she has a boyfriend.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

Just shared via TikTok:

It’s not too early to go to sleep. Too early only applies to waking up.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

I’m not asking for a lot, I just want someone down to earth that’s gonna touch me all over like my shower curtain does.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Who called it a deep freeze instead of ice-o-lation?

Just shared via TikTok:

The sole purpose of your child’s middle name… is so they know when they’re really in trouble.

Just shared via Slack:

Kinda sucks that I actually own a skeleton but don’t get to show anyone until I die.

Making waves on Reddit:

Are you a software update, because not now!

Spotted on TikTok:

Sometimes I tell myself I should stop drinking so much, but I’m not about to listen to a drunk who’s talking to himself.

Home » Funny Report Quotes

Funny report quotes

Funny report quotes bring a splash of humor 🎉 to otherwise serious documents 📄. Whether you’re tackling boring stats or dry analysis, these witty lines add a smile 😄 and keep readers hooked. Perfect for lightening the mood and making reports unforgettable, they turn dull moments into bursts of laughter 😂. Ready to spice up your next report? Let’s dive into the funniest gems that make data fun! 🚀✨

New funny report quotes 👇

2 months ago
Share →: Gutted to report that spending a day offline, touching grass with my friends, was phenomenal for my mental health.

…

Commentary:
"Who knew Mother Nature's WiFi was this strong? 🌿😂 #GrassTherapy"
2 months ago
Share →: I did some soul searching last night. I’m happy to report I still have one.

Commentary:
"Glad you found it! Sometime they like to play hide and seek. 😄🕵️‍♂️✨"
6 months ago
Share →: Spotify wrapped is like my annual mental health report and it’s getting worse by each passing year.

Commentary:
"Looks like my Spotify wrapped is turning into a horror film sequel 🎬👻🎵 Who knew my mental health could be measured in play counts and skip ratios? 📈😅 #ScaryStats"
6 months ago
Share →: Happy to report that “what time is it/time for you to get a watch” is still being used by the youths.

Commentary:
Well, it looks like the timeless classic comeback of "what time is it/time for you to get a watch" is still ticking strong among the youths ⌚😂! Who knew that telling time could also tell us so much about Generation Z's sass levels! Keep clockin' those witty retorts, young ones! ⏰🕰️
6 months ago
Share →: Wanted to report a YouTube video, but there is no option for “Cringe”, so I just picked “Terrorism”.

Commentary:
"Looks like someone took the term 'cringe-worthy' to a whole new level! 🤦‍♂️😂 Can we get a special category for 'Epic Fail' next time, please? 🙏🚫 #YouTubeStruggles"
6 months ago
Share →: If reports from this daisy are accurate, she loves me not.

Commentary:
Looks like this daisy has a very serious case of mixed signals 🌼❤️ One minute it's "loves me," the next it's "loves me not" – talk about a rollercoaster of emotions! Who knew flowers could be so indecisive? 😄🌸
6 months ago
Share →: When you report something to IT and then hear: “Oh! Interesting. We’ve never seen that before.” Is that good or bad?

Commentary:
Oh, the classic IT mystery – the thrill of the unknown! 🤔💻 It's like discovering a rare unicorn in the digital realm! 🦄 Just remember, sometimes being unique can be a good thing… unless you're talking about tech issues! 😂 #ITadventures

For even more funny report quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny report quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1817 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,979

Funny Quotes Topics

14,787

Funny Quotes Images

11,979

53 seconds ago

3,427

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

Went to the hairdresser today and now I look much younger. I’m thinking about going back tomorrow.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

“I’m gonna sneak past you.” No you’re not. You’ve alerted me.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has viewed:

The sexiest thing a man can do is have a problem-solving mentality.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has downloaded:

My signature move is me looking for my phone that I’m currently holding in my hand.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has bookmarked:

Say what you want about online meetings, but there are few things more liberating than attending a disciplinary hearing naked from the waist down.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has shared:

I’m bored, but not read a book for fun bored.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

One thing that sucks about being grown-up is not being able to say, “My mom said no,” when you don’t want someone to come over.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has shared:

They should invent a way to delete other people’s posts.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has downloaded:

What if i just replied “not now kitten daddy’s busy” to all my work emails?

Someone from 🇴🇲 has bookmarked:

This morning, like every morning, he practiced his quick draw of his finger guns in the bathroom mirror, because you just never know.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

Oh, how much I love a Sunday when you don’t have to work the next day.

Trending via Instagram:

Due to inflation and tariffs, my love now costs a thing.

Broadcasted on Threads:

If Wonka had a spaghetti factory, I’d get sucked into a marinara river tube so fast.

Spotted on WeChat:

I’ll marry the person who can go to a family event with me and still like me afterward.

Trending via Instagram:

Eight times a day, I ask myself which object in the office will hurt me enough so that I can go home, but at the same time won’t hurt too much.

Just shared via Discord:

When I finally snap it’ll be because I had to type my email address in on the TV.

Spotted on Twitch:

There’s no filter on my pics or my thoughts. I’m just out here raw-dogging it.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

I’m really looking forward to another exciting year staring at my phone.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

My wife trusts me with a joint bank account but when I’m loading the dishwasher she always walks in the kitchen “to get something.”

Shared recently on Discord:

It’s important that everyone takes really good pictures of me this summer.

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