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Someone from 🇨🇱 has viewed:

Toddlers: the brutally honest roommates nobody asked for!

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

I need you to put the fun in refund!

Someone from 🇨🇱 has viewed:

For Thanksgiving don’t ask me about my life, just pass me the bottle.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has shared:

Very disappointed to find out that the universal remote control I bought does not control the universe.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has copied:

Do goalies ever get lonely during a game?

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

The only thing I love more than an open mind is an open bar.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

I might not be able to speak another language but I can speak English slower!

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

Therapy? I have Spotify.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has bookmarked:

Is it just my dad, or do all fathers watch videos on their phones with the volume full blast, with no concern for anyone else in the house?

Someone from 🇮🇹 has shared:

I’m pretty sure emojis were invented so introverts don’t have to say anything to anyone.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

522 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,115

Funny Quotes Topics

17,265

Funny Quotes Images

15,115

Updated

Dec 25, 2025

Users Online

3,911

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Reddit:

I love diss tracks because it’s basically two dudes going, “grr, we hate each other so much we’re going to take turns writing increasingly personalized poetry!”

Making waves on TikTok:

Is it ‘My wife and I’ or ‘Me and my wife’? Anyway, we just robbed a liquor store.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

The most disturbing thing about waking up at 4 a.m. is realizing some people do this on purpose so they can exercise.

Just landed via Messenger:

A sandwich has the power to change your entire life.

Making waves on TikTok:

For all those wondering, yes, I am retired. I was tired yesterday, and I am tired again today.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

“You live and you learn!” Bro, I don’t want to do either of those things.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

That pile of clothes on my bed, seems to have strange powers and gets higher on its own.

Live now on Instagram:

Had some plain yogurt with protein powder in it for breakfast, and not only is it high in protein and very filling, it’s also disgusting.

Just landed via Messenger:

I think my bank account has been taking Ozempic.

Trending via Slack:

Every laptop should have a “cat” button that disables the keyboard so they can nap.

Home » Funny Tomorrow Quotes » Page 3

71 Funny tomorrow quotes

More funny tomorrow quotes 👇

Why put off until tomorrow what you can have an intern do today?

0

2 months ago

humor, intern, office, procrastination, productivity, put, task, today, tomorrow, why, work
I hate when people ask me what I’m doing tomorrow, I don’t even know what I’m doing today.

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2 months ago

doing, expectations, hate, humor, i, life, me, people, planning, procrastination, today, tomorrow, uncertainty
People who shower at night are bold enough to assume tomorrow’s even happening.

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2 months ago

assume, assumption, bold, confidence, enough, even, happening, humor, night, people, routine, shower, tomorrow
Tomorrow isn’t promised, we need to kiss today.

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2 months ago

enjoy, fun, kiss, live, need, promise, spontaneity, today, tomorrow
Tomorrow isn’t promised, we need to flirt today.

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2 months ago

flirt, fun, humor, need, promise, relationship, spontaneity, today, tomorrow
I already want to come home from work tomorrow.

0

2 months ago

anticipation, home, humor, i, tomorrow, want, work, workday
I haven’t even gone to bed yet and I already can’t wait to get home from work tomorrow.

0

2 months ago

anticipation, bed, home, humor, i, tiredness, tomorrow, wait, work, workplace
If you say “awesome sauce” on a first date, you’ll still have that lucky condom in your wallet tomorrow.

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2 months ago

awesome, awesome sauce, condom, date, first date, funny moment, humor, lucky, lucky condom, moment, relationship, sauce, say, still, tomorrow, wallet
Tomorrow isn’t promised, so make sure you tell bad people they’re bad.

0

2 months ago

advice, bad, bad people, honesty, humor, people, promise, sure, tell, tomorrow
That was a nice hour long Twitter scroll. Feel much worse as always. See you guys tomorrow.

0

2 months ago

always, feel, guys, hour, humor, irony, media, much, nice, procrastination, scroll, self-reflection, social, social media, tomorrow, Twitter, worse

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Social Media Stars ⭐

65 shares on Snapchat this month:

Can we normalize arguing with little kids? They’re so rude.

53 shares on YouTube this month:

I make sure to post my political opinions after my selfies have gone viral to cull the herd.

70 shares on Telegram this month:

At least I’m part of the generation that at 30 still looks like it’s in its early 20s.

94 shares on Facebook this month:

Considering joining a cult just for the subsidized housing.

92 shares on Threads this month:

I think during winter we should also get to work less hours in a day, just like the sun.

89 shares on Discord this month:

This entire “presidency” is like being tied to a chair and watching a toddler play with a loaded pistol.

56 shares on Threads this month:

Having to pee when you’re driving is problematic. Having to sneeze when you’re driving is even more problematic.

92 shares on Snapchat this month:

If I meet you at a party and you instantly start asking about my job, you are subhuman to me.

79 shares on Messenger this month:

Born to screenshot everything and never look at it again.

48 shares on Snapchat this month:

Always do sober what you said you’d do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇲 has shared:

Yoda, seeing himself in 4K: HDMI

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

People used to fly kites. Glad that’s over with.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

The bowling ball actually hangs out with the pins after work. There isn’t beef there.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

We used to have “spring, summer, fall, winter”. Today we have “drama, drama, drama, drama”.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

There will be people in your life that say you have too many books. Those are not your people.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

If we breakup because you “wanna focus on school,” I better see you in Harvard.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has bookmarked:

Surround yourself with people who google the menu of the restaurant beforehand.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

Someone at my job mentioned severance, and I was like, “Oh my God, I love that show,” and they said, “No, I’m about to get fired.”

Someone from 🇬🇶 has bookmarked:

I’m very loyal to whatever brand is on sale.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

Life is full of questions. Idiots are full of answers.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

What do you mean a baguette isn’t a female bag?

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Teens be like, “I wanted to do that until you asked me to.”

Trending via Pinterest:

The Recipe for Disaster in me, recognizes the Appetite for Destruction in you.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Every Jurassic Park movie should end with an insurance adjuster getting a phone call and immediately throwing up.

Making waves on Threads:

Getting a second opinion about my Tamagotchi’s health.

Shared recently on Telegram:

You do not have to prove your own humanity to others. Unless it’s a captcha.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

No revenge, because I don’t even remember what happened.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I’m just impressed by how ugly I’m willing to look in public these day.

Making waves on X:

If you comment to say “No comment,” you have, in fact, commented.

Just shared via TikTok:

The problem with rich people is that I am not one.

Activity Log ✨

71 Funny tomorrow quotes

More funny tomorrow quotes 👇

All funny tomorrow quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨