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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

I’m buysexual, you buy me food, I become sexual.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has downloaded:

Can’t wait to put up holiday lights so life can be equally crappy but festively so.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has shared:

Love triangle? You mean this Dorito?

Someone from 🇱🇻 has bookmarked:

Umbrellas are great if you only want to get wet sideways.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has copied:

When I eat rotisserie chicken, I like to pretend that I’m performing an autopsy.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has copied:

I would love to go back to the days when the biggest stress was finding the best hiding place when playing hide and seek.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

Gonna go walk the beach and stare annoyingly at couples. May even growl as I pass by.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

Don’t worry, you’ll find the lost scissors when you’ll be searching for your glasses.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

Maybe your dog is barking at my luggage because he doesn’t enjoy his job, officer.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has downloaded:

I am awake and ready to be disappointed.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

765 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,927

Funny Quotes Topics

13,899

Funny Quotes Images

10,927

33 minutes ago

3,425

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Snapchat:

We are both insane on the web, I think we can make it work.

Making waves on Messenger:

I found out why my computer keeps freezing. Apparently, I’ve got too many windows open.

Shared recently on Facebook:

This is a horrible time in history to be a decent human being.

Trending via Telegram:

No one has ever believed in me more than this waitress, who brought me buffalo wings and a single wet nap.

Just landed via Pinterest:

“Would you like to check your account balance?” God no. My balance is none of my business.

Seen just now on Instagram:

My dad once sneezed so hard that he set every clock back two hours.

Just landed via YouTube:

Whoever came up with the name wallpaper really nailed it.

Going viral on Twitch:

So you mean to tell me a stress ball is not for throwing at people who stress you out?

Just shared via Reddit:

Parents saying “I know my child” will forever be the funniest joke.

Just shared via Threads:

He probably could have just called himself “Andre.” I think I would have figured out The Giant part on my own.

Still can’t believe America has a federal holiday to celebrate the hit movie Independence Day.

6 months ago

Still can’t believe America has a federal holiday to celebrate the hit movie Independence Day.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Well, you know what they say, when a blockbuster movie saves the world from aliens, it deserves its own federal holiday! 🎬🪐🎉 Just imagine the founding fathers in a popcorn-filled cinema, watching Will Smith and Jeff Goldblum saving the day – quite the historical moment! 🍿👽🇺🇸 #IndependenceDay2.0

America, believe, celebrate, celebration, day, hit, holiday, humor, independence, Independence Day, irony, movie, still

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

765 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,927

Funny Quotes Topics

13,899

Funny Quotes Images

10,927

33 minutes ago

3,437

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

A real smart TV would increase the volume when you start eating chips.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

Job interviewer: Where do you see yourself in 5 years? Me: I would say my biggest weakness is listening.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has bookmarked:

I like to live life dangerously by occasionally sticking my foot out over the edge of the bed at night.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has downloaded:

Victor Frankenstein being only 23 years old when he made the monster is crazy to me, he should have been at the club.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has downloaded:

My lawyer dropped his briefcase and nunchuks fell out.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

I have consumed so much potato salad the last couple of days, I’m sweating mayo.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

Only money has the right to say “you’ll regret losing me”. The rest of you calm down.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has shared:

Responding to any and all emails with ‘wow ok’

Someone from 🇲🇿 has copied:

Good friends don’t let their friends do stupid things alone.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

At this point making life choices involves liquor and a dart board.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on WhatsApp:

If you ever need me, call me any time, day or night, and I’ll return your call when I get around to it.

Just landed via Pinterest:

My fight or flight response has frequent flyer miles.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Relationship status: I love my bed.

Live now on Reddit:

“Twister 3” should be told from a cow’s POV.

Just shared via TikTok:

I wonder what the part of my brain that used to store people’s phone numbers is doing now.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

My spirit animal is chasing his own tail.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Money enters like Beyoncé and exits like Britney.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

I hope this email finds you in a well.

Going viral on Telegram:

A 12 step program but it’s just me getting off the couch.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

“That’s an interesting take,” I say, not listening.

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