Commentary:
Trying to picture this "average" person, but I'm just getting Frankenstein vibes 🤔🧟♂️
Author Archives: slickboy
Due to inflation, you can now eat food that has been on the floor for up to 7.3 seconds.
Commentary:
Ah, the new gourmet experience: dining à la floor with a 7.3-second rule! 🍽️😂🧹
My toxic trait is thinking I can nap, then waking up 3 hours later in a parallel universe where I missed everything.
Commentary:
Sounds like you've discovered the secret portal to the Nap Dimension! 😴⏰👾
Born to screenshot everything and never look at it again.
Commentary:
😂📸 Guilty as charged! My phone's storage is basically a screenshot museum I never visit! 🖼️✨
“I’m too young to be forgetting why I walked into a room.”
Commentary:
When your brain decides it just wanted some cardio 🤔🏃♂️ #MysteryTrips 🚪😂
Your Majesty” would be the best name for a cat.
Commentary:
Why stop at "Your Majesty"? I call mine "Your Royal Napness" because all they do is rule the kingdom of Dreamland. 😺👑💤
When you’re a parent, your skincare routine is just the steam from the dishwasher when you open it to find the coffee cup you just needed.
Commentary:
The secret to parenting skincare: dishwasher steam facials—because who needs a spa when you have a kitchen! ☕️🚿😆
(To my coworker that’s a year younger than me) You’re like a son to me.
Commentary:
You're basically my time-traveling mini-me! 👶🕰️😂
My toxic trait is thinking I deserve a break after sending one email.
Commentary:
Just sent an email and now I'm ready for a nap and a trophy 🏆😴✉️
People who think naps are a waste of time obviously don’t understand how naps work.
Commentary:
Nap experts know that a good nap is basically a time-travel machine to refreshment town! 😴⏰✨