Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

There should be an opposite of Valentine’s Day where you post Instagram photos of your enemy.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has viewed:

I followed my heart, and it led me to the fridge.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has viewed:

I think we all know who to blame for the generation of parents who put too many Ys in their kids’ names. Lynyrd Skynyrd.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has shared:

I think humans are meant to lay in bed with the love of their life all winter.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

Interrupt my sleep and I’ll interrupt your breathing.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

Apple, who gives you permission to turn the brightness down again when I’ve just turned it up?

Someone from 🇨🇫 has bookmarked:

Controlling your anger at work is a job in itself.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

Whoever said it was okay to let your pets sleep in your bed, thanks a lot, now my goldfish is dead.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

Getting the ick because he put the windshield wipers on at a higher rate than was needed.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

There must be an invisible mechanism on my book. Every time I open it, my husband starts trying to talk to me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,410

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

I was born a boy, but according to the packaging, I identify as a family of four.

Trending via Discord:

My brain is on airplane mode today.

Seen just now on Discord:

At the beginning of a relationship, people call their partner’s odd behavior “cute little quirks”. Some years later, the police call it “motive”.

Spotted on Reddit:

Terrible things can happen if you go camping. For starters, you could want to go camping again.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

OK, just so everybody’s clear, I’m going to put my glasses on.

Just landed via Reddit:

On my way to Mordor. You nerds need anything?

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Prior to the arrival of Paper and Scissors, Rock faced no competition.

Going viral on YouTube:

Why put off until tomorrow what you can have an intern do today?

Shared recently on Pinterest:

I’d enjoy summer a lot more if someone came by hourly and misted me like produce.

Called off work. Feeling fat and wearing jeans.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When you realize your jeans have transformed into a denim prison 😂👖🍕

called, called off, care, casual, casual wear, day, day off, fat, feeling, feeling fat, jeans, self, self-care, wear, work

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

At the end of my appointment, the doctor took her own blood pressure.

0

2 months ago

appointment, blood, blood pressure, doctor, end, humor, irony, medical, own, pressure, self-care
When life gives you lemons, take the lemons. They were a gift. Maybe life thought you liked lemons. Did you think about that? No, you’re always thinking about yourself.

0

2 months ago

always, gift, humor, lemon, lemons, life, maybe, perspective, sarcasm, self, take, think, thinking, thought, yourself
You ever been in the middle of a conversation and realized this is why you avoid people?

0

2 months ago

anxiety, avoid, avoiding, avoiding people, awkward, awkward moment, conversation, ever, humor, interaction, middle, moment, people, social, social anxiety, social interaction, why
Has anyone else noticed that it’s hard to do things when you don’t want to?

0

4 weeks ago

anyone, effort, else, hard, humor, motivation, noticed, observation, procrastination, reluctance, task, things, want
I get it, credit cards, I’ve reached my limit too.

0

2 months ago

card, cards, credit, credit card, finances, humor, i, joke, limit, spending, too
The great thing about playing the trombone is no one knows if you’re good at it or not.

0

2 months ago

activity, fun, fun activity, good, great, humor, instrument, knows, music, performance, playing, skill, talent, thing, trombone, unknown

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

43 shares on Reddit this month:

That strange moment when you are trying to be serious, but then you accidentally smile.

35 shares on Twitch this month:

I took some free community martial arts lessons for self-defense, but I’m starting to think Tai Chi is too slow for most muggers.

32 shares on Snapchat this month:

I do not like FaceTime unless we’re best friends or I’m in love with you.

50 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My body is a temple. An ancient, creaky temple with questionable plumbing.

52 shares on Threads this month:

I didn’t ghost you, I saved you from me.

41 shares on WhatsApp this month:

People can’t drive you crazy if you don’t give them the keys.

65 shares on Twitch this month:

Not using emoji while texting is my way to show that I’m serious.

85 shares on Slack this month:

Fun fact: Malcolm X was not his birth name. He was originally Malcolm Twitter.

89 shares on Snapchat this month:

A large group of people is called an “eww, no thank you”

27 shares on Pinterest this month:

The best way for me to stick to my diet is to go straight back to sleep after breakfast.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇸 has downloaded:

Somebody needs to get my shit together.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

My favorite pirate song is “Aye of the Tiger”

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

That was pointless, we could’ve just stayed strangers.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has copied:

YOLO because stupid people don’t know what Carpe Diem means.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

I just want a man to look at me the way Doc from ‘Back to the Future’ looks when something exciting happens.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has downloaded:

Second day without coffee. I can no longer hear out of my left eye.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

Play your cards right and we could be wearing matching fanny packs this summer.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has shared:

Nowadays an “all-nighter” means I didn’t have to get up to pee.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

Imagine if we had to worry about dinosaurs too, on top of everything else.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has shared:

Women are like a fitted sheet. No matter what you do or how hard you try, they just never seem to cooperate.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Slack:

Staring at the sky for answers, nothing new.

Just landed via WeChat:

I am so out of shape right now, that if someone yelled “run for your life!” I’d be like “ya’ll go ahead, I’m meetin’ Jesus today!”

Making waves on Snapchat:

Don’t you hate it when you lose things? Like the motivation to do anything.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

Adulting is realizing you can’t skip work like you skipped class.

Spotted on Discord:

I heard a mouse yesterday. So now I loudly announce myself whenever I enter a dark room. In case you’re wondering how brave I am.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Wish I could get paid just for being a sweetheart.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Just because it’s a bad idea doesn’t mean it won’t be a good time.

Seen just now on TikTok:

The only reason I haven’t gone crazy yet is because I’m just too lazy.

Breaking via Slack:

The sweet potato is the kindest vegetable.

Just landed via Instagram:

AI is that friend who is always there for you but gives terrible advice.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Called off work. Feeling fat and wearing jeans.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

At the end of my appointment, the doctor took her own blood pressure.

When life gives you lemons, take the lemons. They were a gift. Maybe life thought you liked lemons. Did you think about that? No, you’re always thinking about yourself.

You ever been in the middle of a conversation and realized this is why you avoid people?

Has anyone else noticed that it’s hard to do things when you don’t want to?

I get it, credit cards, I’ve reached my limit too.

The great thing about playing the trombone is no one knows if you’re good at it or not.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨