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When even penguins are trendier than me with their tiny baguettes, I start questioning my life choices 🐧🥖😆
Tag Archives: 179 Funny actually quotes
Going out to eat and shopping by yourself is actually one of the most peaceful and therapeutic things ever.
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Solo adventures: when you can spend money and talk to yourself without judgment! 🍽️🛍️🧘♀️
If you don’t realize that you’re a werewolf, then you’re actually an unawarewolf.
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Sounds like someone's howling at the oblivious moon! 🌕🐺😂
How old were you when you found out people in porn aren’t actually in love?
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Just found out they aren't in love, and now my heart needs its own parental advisory warning 😳💔😂
I’ve decided that my 20s are actually from 25 – 35.
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When you realize adulting is not a 9 to 5 but more like a 25 to 35! 🕰️😅 #RebootTheTwenties
I’m actually really fun once you get to know me (takes 3-4 years).
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Sounds like downloading a large file on dial-up internet 😂⏳📂
That period between finding out you got a new job and actually starting the new job is one of the best times in life.
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Enjoying my official title of 'Employed but Not Yet Obligated'! 😎🕺💼
We need a word for a type of person who spends all their time working to live in a city so they can be near cool things, but they don’t actually like going out.
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Sounds like they're in a committed relationship with their couch—Netflix and chill are their favorite landmark! 🛋️📺🥤
Lowkey terrifying when someone attractive is actually into you, omg.
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When your crush actually likes you back and you secretly wonder if they're trolling: 🕵️♀️😳👀
Sorry for texting you back instantly. My phone was in my hand, and I’m mature and actually like you.
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When your phone's a magnet and maturity strikes at the wrong time 😂📱💬