Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇳 has viewed:

You can talk about any topic for 30 mins if you’re a confident liar.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

Nightmares are so embarrassing. Why is my anxiety working the night shift?

Someone from 🇵🇱 has shared:

I love saying “my man” and not his name, so when I get a new one, nobody knows.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

I be like “communication is the key” then put my phone on do not disturb.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

There are 8 billion people in the world and I only have 3 friends, and one is annoying.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

“We’re the only species that drinks milk after infancy, dairy is bad for you!” We’re also the only species that drinks peach mango pineapple spirulina kale smoothies, Karen. Let me eat my cheese in peace.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has viewed:

I feel so bad when I overtake an old person on the sidewalk. Like, man, I really didn’t mean to flex on you with my youthful stride.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

In search of someone who loves me as much as I love my snooze button.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has viewed:

Showing my barber a Rorschach test, and he gives me his mother’s haircut.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

You know you’re an introvert when you want to go home before even leaving the house.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,601

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Twitch:

No, sorry, next week won’t work. I’ll be a shadow of what I once was.

Just landed via Pinterest:

A college education is one of the few things a person is willing to pay for and not get.

Just landed via YouTube:

I really don’t get enough praise for someone who doesn’t need validation from others.

Going viral on Instagram:

Slipping into something a little more comfortable (psychosis).

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Wonder what I should wear to World War III.

Going viral on Facebook:

Some people find it strange when you talk to your pet. I find conversations with some people much stranger.

Just shared via Messenger:

Need a permanent vacuum for unwanted thoughts.

Just landed via Threads:

Maybe one day a street will be named after me. Or a school. Or a mental hospital.

Shared recently on Reddit:

If you ever need me, call me any time, day or night, and I’ll return your call when I get around to it.

Trending via Twitch:

This year for Thanksgiving, I’ll probably bring what I brought last year… shame upon the family.

Funny advent calendar quotes

Funny advent calendar quotes bring a sprinkle of holiday cheer and laughter to your countdown 🎄😂 Perfect for spreading joy while you unwrap each surprise, these witty sayings add a cheeky twist to the festive season 🎁✨ Get ready to giggle, grin, and make every day leading up to Christmas a little brighter and a lot more fun! 🎅🎉 #HolidayHumor #CountdownToChristmas

New funny advent calendar quotes 👇

All funny advent calendar quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

54 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Fifty shades of I miss you.

19 shares on X this month:

Bugs Bunny was my introduction to opera. Can’t say I’ve kept up with it much since.

69 shares on Twitch this month:

The Gen Z stare. The millennial pause. Instead, let’s talk about the boomer inappropriate personal question.

16 shares on Discord this month:

Self-cleaning conscience.

14 shares on TikTok this month:

I hate people that talk to their Apple watch. Fake Power Rangers.

93 shares on TikTok this month:

I’m not “dating to marry” or “dating for fun.” I’m dating for a secret third reason.

68 shares on Discord this month:

I fall in love with a song and play it until I absolutely don’t wanna hear it no more.

44 shares on Facebook this month:

Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth. Then it’s a soap opera.

54 shares on Discord this month:

Three drinks in and that skateboard outside is looking rideable.

57 shares on Instagram this month:

I get easily confused in the morning. Also in the afternoon and evening.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m just so lazy because I’m still recovering from the fact that I used to be the fastest sperm.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Chip bags should be clear, show me what you want me to pay $6 for, cowards.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Nobody seems more shocked, disappointed and dismayed than the person behind the post office counter when I arrive and say I’ve got something to post.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s awesome when people honk at you for not moving when you’re letting people cross. You’re right, bro, I should just annihilate this family of four.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Please remember, I am an inspiration for birth control.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I was not prepared for my knees to sound like someone is breaking spaghetti noodles in half every time I go up the stairs.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

How many times does one have to open the fridge door before cake appears inside?

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Of all the ways to be miserable, marriage is the most expensive.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Had calamari for the first time ever, and it wasn’t that bad. Maybe I’ll try marriage next.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I can always tell what part of my cycle I’m in by how concerned my friends are over my Tweets.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,464

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

Sorry I’m late. My catapult malfunctioned.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

Seen an ambulance at the hospital. I hope the doctors are okay.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

May I please come over and curl up in your lap like a cat?

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

Candy cigarettes really used to be a thing and we really bought them and walked around like we were smokers at the tender age of 6.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has shared:

Aliens will always remain unidentified because they’re embarrassed to be associated with us humans.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has copied:

People say that they want to be tall, but don’t realize how many times tall people are assaulted by spiderwebs.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

The first time I heard “big naturals,” I thought it referred to major outdoor landmarks such as the Grand Canyon or the Great Barrier Reef.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

Exercise gives you energy, but you need energy to exercise. Sounds like a pyramid scheme to me.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

There’s no way the Scooby Doo gang never found a dead body.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has copied:

Honestly, I don’t even play an active role in my life any more. Things just happen and I’m like “I guess this is what we’re doing now.”

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Reddit:

I automatically assume everyone finds me unattractive until they tell me otherwise, and then I assume that they are lying to make fun of me.

Spotted on Slack:

It’s so peaceful when you have no interest in other people’s business.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

If I worked for UPS, there would be a 100% chance I’m falling out that open door when I turn a corner too fast.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

If you were the birthday gift I bought my wife some months ago, where would you be hiding?

Going viral on Telegram:

I put the dance in “Good riddance!”

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

Hobbies include being misunderstood.

Breaking via WeChat:

I was gonna kiss you under the blood moon eclipse, but whatever, bro.

Going viral on TikTok:

I need the youth to start reading. Even if it’s the tag on your underwear. Read it.

Going viral on Threads:

Does everyone in the world want to come to my house tomorrow?

Just landed via Discord:

It’s unfortunate that scrubbing the floors on your hands and knees is so much more effective than mopping.

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