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Don’t let anyone ruin your day. Be a man. Ruin it yourself.

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Don’t buy roses for her, buy chicken nuggets. Show her you really care.

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Never trust people who smile constantly. They’re either selling something or not very bright.

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Enjoy the time between diapers!

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I modeled my morning routine on the humble rooster. Wake up, scream, wander around.

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All day I think about sleep but when itโ€™s time to go to bed I donโ€™t wanna.

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The highest act of rebellion is to relax unconditionally.

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Home ยป Funny Avocado Quotes ยป Page 2

16 Funny avocado quotes

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