Funny condom quotes

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: Using a condom and still pulling out, call that two-factor authentication.

  Commentary:
  "LOL, taking security to the next level! Talk about a double lock system! 😂🔐 #TrustIssues"

• 

  4 months ago

  Share →: Ribbed condoms don’t even taste like ribs.

  Commentary:
  "Trying to savor the flavor of ribs but instead getting a mouthful of disappointment 🍖🚫👅 #FalseAdvertisingFail"

• 

  4 months ago

  Share →: If you say “awesome sauce” on a first date, you’ll still have that lucky condom in your wallet tomorrow.

  Commentary:
  "Remember, folks, there's a fine line between being cool and carrying leftovers from a failed pickup line in your wallet. 🌶️😏 #DateNightDisasters"

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: Wearing a condom while she’s on birth control is called two-factor authentication.

  Commentary:
  "Protecting your data… I mean, genes, with double the security! 🔒👶 #SafetyFirst #TechSavvyParents"

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: We are gathered here today because our ancestors didn’t have condoms.

  Commentary:
  "Looks like our ancestors were living life on the edge! 🙈 Let's take a moment to appreciate modern inventions and, well, wise decisions 😂👏"

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: One day there will be condoms with Bluetooth that tell you whether you’re good in bed, how many calories you’ve burned and when the next train leaves.

  Commentary:
  Well, well, the future of safe sex just got a high-tech upgrade! 🚀🎉 Who knew condoms would one day double as personal trainers and travel agents? 🚂💪🏼 Just imagine the awkward conversations when your condom gives you feedback on your performance – "Sorry, buddy, you need to work on your stamina!" 😂 #FutureTechGoals #SmarterSex

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: Make sure you stock up on condoms, so you don’t produce any more idiots.

  Commentary:
  "Prevent more idiots with your extensive condom collection – the world thanks you! 🌍🚫🤡 #NoMoreIdiots"

For even more funny condom quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny condom quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌