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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇮 has downloaded:

I wasn’t planning on moving, but I was just invited to the neighborhood fall potluck, so I guess now I have no choice.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

IKEA assembly instructions should come with a glossary of Swedish swear words.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

If you’re looking for a wild woman, I just took all of my vitamins in one gulp.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has shared:

Wine must breathe. I always hear that wine needs to breathe. I want to drink it and not revive it.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has viewed:

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking recently, and I’ve decided that I really don’t want to do that any more.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

At the end of the day, the day is going to end.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

People with ADHD be like “I can’t fry an egg, I got too much going on”.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

A Jackie Chan fight scene where he’s in an IKEA warehouse and he fights off dudes with furniture pieces, but by the end he’s accidentally assembled it all into a complete Malm bedroom set.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

Lou Read is the name of my favorite musician and also the book I keep in the toilet.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has copied:

Can’t believe we stayed up and screamed “Happy New Year” for this shit.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2326 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,488

Funny Quotes Topics

15,192

Funny Quotes Images

12,488

23 minutes ago

3,449

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Discord:

If Dracula had a cat, she’d be the one sleeping in the coffin.

Making waves on Slack:

Going to the gym to exercise my demons.

Just landed via Telegram:

It’s so hot out, I just hydroplaned off the toilet seat at work.

Seen just now on Slack:

Liquor on the top shelf is so expensive because the bartender has to stand on their tippy toes to reach it.

Just shared via Telegram:

The people that sing their heart out, but terribly, are my people.

Shared recently on Threads:

When kids try to guess your age it will either be completely flattering or utterly devastating, but never correct.

Seen just now on Telegram:

I would definitely deny being from here if the aliens pulled up and asked. Not claiming this embarrassing planet in front of intergalactic travelers, are you dumb?

Trending via Twitch:

They should list at least one alien “as himself” in the Star Wars credits.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

People always say, “There’s plenty of fish in the sea” … yeah, but I’ve got my eye fixed on that specific, emotionally distant salmon who has commitment issues.

Making waves on Instagram:

If you’re sleep-deprived and type the symptoms into Google, you’re as good as dead.

Home » Funny February Quotes

Funny February quotes

Funny February quotes bring a burst of laughter to the shortest month of the year ❄️😂 From chilly mornings to cozy nights, these witty lines add warmth and cheer to your winter blues 🧣🔥 Whether you’re surviving Valentine’s Day or just enjoying the snow, get ready to smile and share some giggles all month long! ❤️❄️ #FebruaryFun #LaughOutLoud

New funny February quotes 👇

1 month ago
Share →: I’m fairly certain the person who put the first “r” in February also decided how to spell Wednesday.

Commentary:
"Whoever invented these spellings must have had a 'wry' sense of humor! 🤔🤣🗓️"
6 months ago
Share →: Dry January is out. Sopping Wet February is in.

Commentary:
"Looks like Dry January couldn't weather the storm… Welcome to Sopping Wet February! ☔️💦 Who needs resolutions when you have raindrops to keep you hydrated, right? Let's make a splash this month! 🌧️💧"
6 months ago
Share →: Spotify Wrapped: February was your basketball watermelon loudspeaker phone call hip hop moment.

Commentary:
Looks like February was quite the musical journey for you, from dribbling to the beat of basketballs to screaming into a watermelon loudspeaker while on a phone call! 🏀🍉📢 Maybe next time the hip hop moment will involve less fruit and more rhythm! 🎶😄
Jan 25, 2025
Share →: I am cool with January lasting forever because rent is due February 1.

Commentary:
"January, the month that never ends – perfect for those of us who need an extended deadline for paying rent on time! 😅💸 Who knew endless winter could be so financially convenient? ❄️💰 #JanuaryCheapskate"
Jan 25, 2025
Share →: Awesome that January is over, but rude that our reward for getting through it is February.

Commentary:
"January was like that unexpected guest who overstayed their welcome, and now February is here like 'Surprise, I'm your reward' 🎉🤷‍♂️ Who knew the shortest month could feel so long? 😆 #FebruaryStrikesBack"
Jan 25, 2025
Share →: Whoever removed the 30th and 31st from February, come get the 14th too.

Commentary:
Looks like someone is not a fan of the month of love feeling shortchanged! 😆 Who needs a longer February when we can have more opportunities for chocolates and flowers, am I right? 🍫💐 But seriously, poor February getting picked on like this! 🗓️ #JusticeForFebruary

For even more funny February quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny February quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2326 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,488

Funny Quotes Topics

15,192

Funny Quotes Images

12,488

23 minutes ago

3,463

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

“Nothing beats in-person interaction”. Yeah, with someone I know and love, not Denise from finance.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

76% of pardoned turkeys end up back in the system.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has copied:

Born to be a hater but forced to understand where you’re coming from.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

The first time you forgive out of love. The second time out of hope and the third time out of stupidity.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has viewed:

Ever woken up, kissed the person sleeping next to you and felt glad to be alive? I just did, so I won’t be catching this train again.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

The worst person to share a room with is someone who puts on 10 alarms 2 mins apart each, and wakes up at none.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has bookmarked:

Being an adult is realizing $1000 is little money to have, but a lot to owe.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has copied:

I don’t understand baby oil. What are we greasing up all those babies for?

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

I don’t always push on pull doors but when I do, I do it two or three times to confirm how dumb I really am.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

Keeping my mouth shut is usually not enough to avoid an argument with my husband. I also have to deactivate the subtitle function on my face.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on X:

The possibility of monsters residing underneath your bed is negated when the mattress is positioned on the floor.

Live now on YouTube:

When fireworks were invented, it was ‘hisssss’ to ‘wheeeee’ in the making.

Making waves on Snapchat:

The people who are $30 trillion in debt are giving you a credit score.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

There are real people living amongst us who pay for Discord Nitro.

Just shared via Instagram:

Home is where the Wi-Fi connects automatically and no one chews loud.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

Why isn’t there a mosquito that sucks fat?

Just landed via X:

My kid asked me if I’ve ever experienced hallucinations, which is an odd thing to ask considering I don’t have any kids.

Going viral on TikTok:

I can’t believe Halloween was 10 pounds ago.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Did you know on the Canary Islands there is not one canary? And on the Virgin Isles? Same thing – not one canary there either!

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

I hope the coffee hits harder than reality does.

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