Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: I am “I can’t remember the last time I went out on New Year’s Eve” old.

Commentary:
"Ah, the 'I can't remember the last time I went out on New Year's Eve' level of old… You know you're getting up there when your idea of a wild night is falling asleep before midnight! 🎉👴😂"
6 months ago
Share →: Sorry I’m late, I was fighting for my right to party.

Commentary:
"Apologies for my tardiness, but someone had to bravely battle for the noble cause of partying! 💪🎉 Better late than never, right? 😄 #PartyWarrior"
6 months ago
Share →: Be the reason why a count unleashes ancient horrors onto the world when he thinks of you.

Commentary:
"Be the friend who makes Count Dracula consider bringing out his coffin for a night on the town whenever your name comes up in conversation. 🧛‍♂️💀 #FriendshipGoals #SpookyVibes"
6 months ago
Share →: Going to a wedding really reminds me of the important things in life. Like cake.

Commentary:
"Attending a wedding is a delicious reminder that amidst all life's complexities, cake is a universal constant 🍰💍 Who needs love when there's layers of frosting to devour, am I right?"
6 months ago
Share →: Making fun of bands that only play 3 chords when I don’t even know what a chord is.

Commentary:
"Who needs chords when you have passion and air guitar skills instead? 🎸😂 Keep rocking with your three-chord wonders and let the music do the talking! 🎶🤘"
6 months ago
Share →: An Amish party in the desert called churning man.

Commentary:
"Looks like the Amish are trying to butter us up with their desert escapades! 🌵🕺 Who needs Burning Man when you've got Churning Man? Let's see if they can churn out some dance moves without electricity! 💃⚡"
6 months ago
Share →: I walked into a holiday party, saw someone else already playing with the dog, and realized they’d stolen my entire social strategy.

Commentary:
🐶🎉 "I walked into a holiday party, excited to mingle, only to find my soulmate playing with the dog like it's the last piece of cake! Guess I need to paws and rethink my social game plan. Who knew my competition would be a four-legged furry charmer? 🤷‍♂️🐾 #DoggoStealsTheShow"
6 months ago
Share →: Know what goes good with beer? Another one.

Commentary:
Ah, the age-old wisdom of the beer connoisseur! 🍺🍻 One beer is good, but why settle for good when you can have great? Another round, please! Cheers to always aiming for excellence and having a steadfast commitment to quality control. 😉👍 #BeerLogic
6 months ago
Share →: I’m not tispy. I’m merry.

Commentary:
"Who needs mistletoe when you're feeling merry all year round? 🥂😄 Stay festive and fabulous, darling! Whether you're sipping cocktails or spreading cheer, remember it's all about the merriment! 🎄✨"
6 months ago
Share →: Always be kind. You never know who might own a hot tub.

Commentary:
"Remember folks, kindness is key because you never know when you might get that coveted hot tub invite! 🛁😄 So keep spreading those good vibes and who knows, you might just end up soaking in luxury! #KindnessPaysOff #HotTubGoals"