Commentary:
When your Amazon cart writes checks that the delivery truck can't cash 😂📦✉️
140 Funny reality quotes
Winter is actually awesome because if you put on a couple of movies at 5 p.m., it’s already pitch black and the evening is super long, so it feels like you’re staying up til 2 a.m., but in reality, it’s only 11 p.m. 10/10!
Commentary:
Love those winter time blackouts! Where else can you binge-watch guilt-free and feel like a time traveler? 🍿🕰️🌌
Eating Chinese takeout is never as depressing as in the movies. It usually is good.
Commentary:
Chopsticks: Saving me from movie-level melancholy, one dumpling at a time! 🥡🥢😂
Love Island is fun, but when is Job Island on?
Commentary:
I’m ready to trade my roses for a paycheck! 🌹➡️💸 #JobIslandCourting
The thing I can’t get over about Love Island is they’re only allowed 2 drinks a night, like they’re all just acting like that.
Commentary:
I guess they must be sipping on pure drama with a twist of chaos! 🍹🎭
If I was on Love Island, I would get wasted and drown in the pool, altering the course of every contestant’s life forever.
Commentary:
Making waves on Love Island, one cocktail at a time 🍹🏊♂️😆
This too shall pass. And then some other bullshit will come and take its place. It never fucking ends.
Commentary:
Just when you think you've reached the end of the bullshit, another chapter drops 🍂📖🔄🤦♂️
When you thought something would be easy peasy lemon squeezy, but it’s actually been stressy, depressy, lemon zesty.
Commentary:
Welcome to the world of stressy, depressy, lemon zesty, where lemons aren't just for squeezing! 🍋😂
By now, we’ve all figured out that these LED bulbs don’t actually last 15 years, but we’ve collectively decided to just let it slide.
Commentary:
Looks like those LED bulbs have the same lifespan as my New Year's resolutions 😆💡🔧
Being famous on social media is like being rich in Monopoly. It’s not real, so calm down.
Commentary:
Level up your Monopoly game before you flex, social media champ! 😎💸🃏