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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New funny quotes: 6 this month

15,831 funny quotes and pics

17,824 funny quotes topics

Updated: Jun 2, 2026

 

 

 

 

 

90 Funny shit quotes

Funny shit quotes 🤣 are your ultimate sidekick when you need a dose of humor that hits just right! Whether it’s a clever quip or a cheeky observation, these quotes are guaranteed to turn your day around 😜. Perfect for sharing with friends or spicing up your own inner monologue, they bring laughter in spades and remind us not to take life too seriously 😂. Get ready to giggle, snort, and smile!

People think I forgot the shit they said. Ain’t no expiration date on disrespect.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

I’m about to start telling people, “As long as that makes sense to you,” when they say shit that doesn’t make sense to me.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

My favorite part of my workday is when I grab my shit and leave.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

Customers will say shit like, “Uhh, it’s asking me to remove my card?”

Posted onMay 19, 2026

Adulthood – a never-ending story of shit you have to do.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

I want a girlfriend so she can make me do shit like pottery, and I act like I don’t want to go.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

An alcoholic morning show host becoming Secretary of War is some Kurt Vonnegut shit.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

Sometimes you need to turn the music up louder and sort your shit out.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

Not a gold digger, but the other night a woman told me her grandpa owns a Christmas tree farm. That shit had me rubbing my hands like a fly.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

Call me constipated the way I don’t give a shit.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

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