154 Funny single quotes

• Twitter will always be your best app if you’re single, funny, or just depressed.

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  1 week ago

  always, app, best, depressed, depression, Funny, health, humor, just, media, mental, mental health, single, social, social media, Twitter

• I just found out I have to go on dates to get a boyfriend. I’m sick to my stomach.

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  1 week ago

  anxiety, boyfriend, date, dating, dating anxiety, expectation, found, humor, i, just, life, love, relationship, sick, single, single life, social, social expectation, stomach

• Why do I have to take care of this idiot (me) every single day? Can’t she do anything on her own?

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  1 week ago

  anything, care, daily, daily struggle, day, dialogue, every, frustration, humor, i, idiot, inner, inner dialogue, me, own, self-awareness, self-care, self-deprecating, self-deprecating humor, single, struggle, take, why

• Leaving my apartment for two weeks, but leaving a single cup in the sink as a gesture to continuity upon my return.

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  1 week ago

  absence, apartment, continuity, cup, gesture, humor, leaving, return, routine, single, sink, upon, weeks

• It’s called single sign-on because you have to do it every single time.

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  1 week ago

  authentication, called, every, humor, IT, joke, login, password, sign-on, single, single sign-on, software, technology, time

• There hasn’t been a single person in human history that was remembered for spending their life working a 9-5 job.

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  1 week ago

  9-5, 9-5 job, 95, history, human, human history, job, legacy, life, memory, person, single, spending, work, work life, working

• Do men know they don’t have to date if they’re not over their ex?

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  1 week ago

  advice, breakup, date, dating, dating advice, ex, humor, know, love, man, men, over, relationship, single

• Single introverts be like, “If it’s meant to be, my future love will simply teleport into my living room.”

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  1 week ago

  future, future love, humor, introvert, living, living room, love, meant, relationship, room, simply, single, teleport

• Haven’t seen a single bikini photoshoot in the snow this year; the girls are tired.

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  1 week ago

  bikini, cold, cold weather, fashion, girl, girls, humor, photoshoot, seen, single, snow, tired, weather, winter, year

• The best part about NYC is you literally see a brand new, hottest woman in your entire life every single day.

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  1 week ago

  attraction, best, brand, city, city life, daily, daily life, dating, day, every, hot, hot woman, hottest, humor, life, literally, new, NYC, single, woman

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