Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

She poured the milk before the cereal. It was not meant to be.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has downloaded:

Anyone who thinks things have got so bad that they can only get better is showing a remarkable lack of imagination.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

An email so annoying, you wanna return the computer to the store.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has shared:

Ants can be found on every continent except Antarctica, which is weird considering their name.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has bookmarked:

I don’t “make friends”. I get adopted by extroverts and they make me do things.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has downloaded:

I wish I could have a kid just to see what it looks like… and then put it back.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

Closing down one work tab every day until Christmas like a reverse advent calendar.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

If your coffee shop has a passive-aggressive ‘no Wi-Fi, pretend it’s the old days’ sign, I’m gonna smoke in there and pay 50 cents for coffee.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

I know which nation I like best. Hibernation.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

Why is being alive so expensive? I’m not even having a good time.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

244 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,513

Funny Quotes Topics

17,581

Funny Quotes Images

15,513

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,613

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Snapchat:

The sole purpose of some household items is to make it impossible for you to open the damn drawer.

Just landed via Slack:

I was googling the best time to visit Italy. It is when you have money.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Aliens traveled millions of light years to get here to visit New Jersey.

Just shared via Telegram:

Googling “effect vs affect” in an incognito window.

Trending via Discord:

American Feng Shui is when the grill doesn’t wobble.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

The reason my eyes are dilated is because I am so attracted to you, officer.

Seen just now on WeChat:

I usually start exploring the abyss around 7 p.m.

Shared recently on Twitch:

How many calories does an audible sigh burn? Because I don’t think my Apple Watch is giving me credit for them.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

I Knew Better, But I Did It Anyway: A Memoir

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I don’t even know what the Transformers are fighting about, to be honest.

Hotel towels are always the worst. So thick and fluffy that I can’t even close my suitcase.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Hotel towels: 1, my suitcase: 0. Maybe I'll just wear one on the plane! 🧳🛁😂"

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

The Epstein files are real, but they can’t figure out how to convert them to a PDF.

0

2 months ago

conspiracy, Epstein, Epstein file, figure, file, humor, joke, PDF, real, technology
I came home to find my boyfriend mopping the floor and my first thought was, “who’d he kill?”

0

2 months ago

boyfriend, cleaning, floor, funny observation, home, humor, kill, mopping, observation, relationship, surprise, thought
There’s never a good place to clip your toenails at the library.

0

2 months ago

awkward, awkward situations, clip, funny moments, good, grooming, humor, library, moments, never, place, public, public space, situations, space, toenails
If you turn your phone upside down, the stock market is actually doing quite well.

0

2 months ago

actually, doing, financial, humor, irony, joke, market, perspective, phone, stock, stock market, turn, upside, upside down, well
Human hibernation should be a thing.

0

2 months ago

concept, hibernation, human, idea, relaxation, should, sleep, thing, winter
It’s important to fuel your body with essential nutrients, which can be found in cookies, chips, and candy.

0

3 months ago

body, candy, chip, chips, cookie, diet, essential, food, found, fuel, humor, important, nutrient, snack

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

50 shares on Reddit this month:

I don’t understand why banks get so mad when you can’t pay back your loan. You already knew I had no money when I came to borrow it.

87 shares on Discord this month:

“I’m depressed because there’s not enough cheese in this world to satisfy my hunger for it.”

56 shares on Snapchat this month:

Holding this fart in feels like I’m pregnant with a dinosaur.

57 shares on Pinterest this month:

76% of pardoned turkeys end up back in the system.

82 shares on TikTok this month:

Self-care is putting your face on a very soft cat.

14 shares on Facebook this month:

I like the concept of restaurant appetizers: “Bring me something to eat. And bring me something else to eat while I’m waiting.”

10 shares on Facebook this month:

Sometimes I wonder what happened to the people who asked me for directions.

10 shares on YouTube this month:

Opening up to a woman is like talking to the police, anything you say can and will be used against you.

18 shares on Telegram this month:

Just in case you don’t know, it’s “piqued” your interest, not “peaked”.

21 shares on Instagram this month:

How dare my boss set up a meeting for the time I sneak off early?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇾🇪 has viewed:

Common sense is so rare these days that it should be considered a superpower.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has viewed:

You know the trouble with real life? There’s no danger music.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has copied:

If it’s a ghost ship, why does it have to be on water?

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

I’m fat because I’m full of experiences, and most of those experiences took place at Mexican restaurants.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

Sorry, Mom, I can’t go outside, I’m ugly.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has downloaded:

Asbestos? I’m doing asbestos I can.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

Іf you’re sad about being alone on Valentine’s Day, just remember that nobody loves you on any other day of the year either.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

Oh, sorry, I can’t right now. I’m imagining some things and worrying about them.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

My future husband and I will be stay-at-home parents, and the kids will go to work.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

Spiraling out of control if anyone wants anything.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on X:

Anti-capitalism is just code for “I don’t know how anything works.”

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

Defeating imposter syndrome by actually being incompetent.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I might not be able to speak another language but I can speak English slower!

Freshly posted on WeChat:

One day you’re young and fun and the next you’re searching “Thanksgiving recipes that won’t cause heartburn.”

Trending via TikTok:

Marriage is between two people: one person who is on the verge of sleep and one person who is asking if the front door is locked.

Just shared via Discord:

Do you also have teenagers whose styling motto is: freeze to death for coolness?

Making waves on Instagram:

Everyone says “Do what makes you happy”, until you push them down the stairs.

Just landed via Telegram:

Of course I talk to myself. Sometimes I need expert advice.

Just shared via Telegram:

Start every phone call with “My battery is at 5%” so you can hang up whenever you want.

Making waves on WeChat:

Boyfriends come and go… reply guys stay forever. Against your will, even.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Hotel towels are always the worst. So thick and fluffy that I can’t even close my suitcase.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

The Epstein files are real, but they can’t figure out how to convert them to a PDF.

I came home to find my boyfriend mopping the floor and my first thought was, “who’d he kill?”

There’s never a good place to clip your toenails at the library.

If you turn your phone upside down, the stock market is actually doing quite well.

Human hibernation should be a thing.

It’s important to fuel your body with essential nutrients, which can be found in cookies, chips, and candy.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨