Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

Fifty shades of I miss you.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has viewed:

I’m glad laughter is the best medicine because my insurance sucks.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has viewed:

My fondest childhood memory is being able to sleep through the entire night and waking up rested.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has copied:

Telling men I have a boyfriend doesn’t chase them away anymore, so I’ve started telling them I have a child.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has bookmarked:

I’ve just found my wide pants again. They weren’t gone at all, they’re just my tight pants now.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

Tomorrow isn’t promised, we need to kiss today.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

Tuesday is just Monday wearing a fake mustache.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has viewed:

Called in, “If we’re living in a simulation, just simulate that I’m in the office today.”

Someone from 🇩🇲 has bookmarked:

I’m slowly becoming an adult. Please make it stop.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has downloaded:

How many exercise videos do you have to buy before you get some results?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,352

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Pinterest:

Family Guy is so insane because, why were people dating that dog?

Just shared via X:

Being a toddler’s favorite person is what real love actually looks like.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Dear ghosts, if you can move stuff around and flicker lights, then you can use a mop.

Trending via YouTube:

I enjoy driving because it combines my desire to sit with my talent for being angry.

Shared recently on Threads:

Cows are very calm, considering the whole floor is food to them.

Spotted on Threads:

You know it’s been a successful Thanksgiving when your clothes no longer fit.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

“You’re overthinking this!” Bro, I have anxiety. I have no other type of thinking available.

Trending via Messenger:

My body is like an elastic band – no matter how I stretch it, it goes back to the nap position.

Seen just now on Slack:

Unfortunately, I am literally obsessed with the woman I am when I get stuff done, so I’m just going to keep doing that.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

My heart says, chocolate and wine, but my jeans say “Woman, are you kidding? Eat a salad!”

I don’t approve of political jokes. I’ve seen what happens when they get elected.

3 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Here's my platform: Elect more puns, fewer politicians! 😂🗳️

approval, elected, election, humor, i, joke, jokes, political, political joke, politician, politics, seen

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Just peed so much that a little laugh came out.

0

2 months ago

accident, bodily, bodily function, came, embarrassment, function, humor, joke, just, laugh, little, pee
Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely touched your unread books.

0

2 months ago

activity, babe, book, books, concern, fun, fun activity, okay, reading, relationship, unread, unread book
Not sure what’s longer: a microwave minute or watching a video while someone else is holding the phone, insisting it’s hilarious.

0

5 months ago

else, hilarious, holding, humor, longer, microwave, microwave minute, minute, patience, phone, someone, sure, time, video, watching, while
I don’t think human beings were built to know everything going on in the world all the time.

0

2 months ago

awareness, being, built, everything, going, human, human being, humor, i, information, information overload, know, limits, overload, think, time, world
ALF is what happens when you are high on drugs in the 80s.

0

2 months ago

1980s, 1980s culture, 80s, ALF, culture, drug, drug humor, drugs, high, humor, nostalgic, parody, sitcom, vintage
Everyone should be more grateful for what I don’t say.

0

2 months ago

appreciation, communication, everyone, grateful, gratitude, humor, i, sarcasm, say, should, wit

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

63 shares on Instagram this month:

Stop eating cakes with the fakes and come eat a bundt with a cundt.

73 shares on Facebook this month:

I need to find hobbies that don’t include my debit card.

32 shares on Pinterest this month:

You don’t realize how incorrect and annoying YouTube video essays are until they’re about something you like.

88 shares on Slack this month:

This is the dumbest apocalypse ever.

84 shares on YouTube this month:

Being an adult is mumbling ‘this is stupid’ as you reluctantly slide out of bed.

82 shares on Telegram this month:

“I’m gonna decide everyone’s pronouns and sexuality tonight. And, yes, there will be some big surprises.”

57 shares on Facebook this month:

There’s nothing like the excitement of a brand-new book to add to the massive pile of books I still haven’t read.

98 shares on Reddit this month:

Cats spend two-thirds of their lives sleeping, and the other third making viral videos.

68 shares on Pinterest this month:

I get unreasonably happy when a YouTube video has subtitles that aren’t auto-generated.

74 shares on Pinterest this month:

If you can stand me, you deserve me!

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

Imagine hating me and I don’t notice.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

Monsters can’t hide under my bed. That’s where my cats have their fight club.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

Was complaining to my mom about my daughter’s attitude and she told me I should’ve named her payback.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

You don’t need to explain yourself if you carry a chainsaw.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has copied:

Falling off academically is worse than a heartbreak.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has downloaded:

Pregnancy is crazy. You really come home with someone you don’t know, with no teeth.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

“Well, at least tomorrow is Friday.” -Me, having a bad Wednesday that’s about to get even worse.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

I’m upstairs and the food is downstairs. Send help.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

It doesn’t matter how old you get, buying snacks for a road trip should always look like an unsupervised 9-year-old was given $100.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has copied:

Everybody in the grocery store is my enemy, and I will not be elaborating.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Telegram:

When I die and y’all go through my search history, you’ll be disappointed to find mostly just definitions for very common words that I wasn’t sure I was using correctly.

Going viral on TikTok:

People who take naps are the real heroes. It takes courage to wake up twice in one day.

Going viral on Reddit:

No, I love darkness at 5pm and the death of a nation.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

When I said there’s no such thing as a dumb question, I didn’t expect them to take it as a personal challenge.

Trending via Twitch:

Mice after a breakup be like “we are not on squeaking terms”.

Spotted on Telegram:

It goes like this: You are born and then you basically do almost everything wrong. Then you die.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Teens be like, “I wanted to do that until you asked me to.”

Shared recently on YouTube:

Doing an hour of self-care after 23 hours of self-destruction.

Spotted on Threads:

Many greetings from my coffee. Y’all are talking too much again.

Just shared via TikTok:

Last time I laid on his chest, I heard girls in there laughing at me.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I don’t approve of political jokes. I’ve seen what happens when they get elected.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Just peed so much that a little laugh came out.

Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely touched your unread books.

Not sure what’s longer: a microwave minute or watching a video while someone else is holding the phone, insisting it’s hilarious.

I don’t think human beings were built to know everything going on in the world all the time.

ALF is what happens when you are high on drugs in the 80s.

Everyone should be more grateful for what I don’t say.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨