I got my superpowers when I was bitten by a radioactive idiot.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

What happened to my ankles tonight mosquitologically can never happen again.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

I rode around the block on my bike for the first time in years and now I understand why Lance Armstrong took performance enhancing drugs.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has downloaded:

I ghost family members too, so believe me, bro — it’s not personal.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

I don’t dress for women. I don’t dress for men. I dress for the weather, mainly.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

If it weren’t for this whole job thingy that pays me money, I’d become a professional nap taker.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has viewed:

I think we should all try to spend more time online. It seems to be helping society.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has downloaded:

Person in murder documentary: This is a small town. Things like this don’t happen here. Me: Um, based on the shows I watch, that’s all that happens in small towns.