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"Who knew scrubbing toilets could be so suspenseful? 🚽🕵️‍♀️ Just be sure to dispose of that DNA evidence properly! 🔍💼 #cleaningcrimescene"

activity, bathroom, clean, cleaning, crime, destroy, destroying, evidence, funny activity, humor, i, listening, podcast, pretend, true, true crime

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

A woman’s G-spot can be found at the end of the word shopping.

1 month ago
activity, end, found, fun, fun activity, G-spot, humor, joke, relationship, shopping, woman, word
I don’t need the audio tour at the museum, I have my teen to provide critical commentary the entire time.

1 month ago
activity, audio, audio tour, commentary, critique, family, humor, museum, need, teen, time, tour, visit
As a man, it’s my job to mistake kindness for flirting.

1 month ago
flirting, gender, gender stereotype, humor, job, kindness, man, mistake, misunderstanding, stereotype
You can’t change your past but you can change your pasta.

1 month ago
advice, change, food, humor, life, life advice, past, pasta, wordplay
The Titanic is a great lesson of why “just the tip” can get you into a whole lot of trouble.

1 month ago
disaster, great, humor, iceberg, joke, just, lesson, lot, tip, Titanic, trouble, whole, why
A new year resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other.

1 month ago
goal, humor, irony, motivation, new, new year, resolution, year

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇭 has shared:

They should invent a person for me and me only.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has viewed:

I haven’t given up on my fairy-tale ending. I still plan to be eaten by a wolf.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

Conflicts may arise but always remember to be the bitter person.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

Fact: Snow in November happens because people decorate for Christmas prematurely. You know who you are. Stop it.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has shared:

“Easy like Sunday morning” is something people with no kids say.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

You can either have a nice evening or you can help your child with their math homework. You can’t have both.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has viewed:

I identify as a weather forecast: Anything’s possible.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Messenger:

Me at war: You guys mind if I leave a bit early today?

Going viral on Reddit:

Maybe the elephant doesn’t want to be addressed, and we should respect their boundaries.

Just shared via YouTube:

People make the mistake of keeping aubergines in the fridge, when in fact they should be kept in the bin.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Job interviewer: “Where do you see yourself in 5 years’ time?” Me: “My greatest strength is that I’m a good listener.”

Shared recently on Telegram:

Ripped a tag off my leggings and did not realize it was load-bearing.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

The urge to pee in the morning is so aggressive. Bro, like, chill we’re getting there. Don’t threaten to come out.

Freshly posted on Threads:

The people that sing their heart out, but terribly, are my people.

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Activity Log ✨

I like listening to true crime podcasts while I clean my bathroom because I can pretend I’m destroying evidence.

A woman’s G-spot can be found at the end of the word shopping.

I don’t need the audio tour at the museum, I have my teen to provide critical commentary the entire time.

As a man, it’s my job to mistake kindness for flirting.

You can’t change your past but you can change your pasta.

The Titanic is a great lesson of why “just the tip” can get you into a whole lot of trouble.

A new year resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

I set my alarms extra early to make sure I have enough time to lay in bed and be angry about having to wake up.

Can’t wait for my husband to see what he bought everyone for Christmas.

Welcome to your 40’s: you have big plans tonight. No, you don’t.

If you’re going to be weird, be confident about it.

Be yourself cause no one wants to be like you!

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

“I’m gonna decide everyone’s pronouns and sexuality tonight. And, yes, there will be some big surprises.”

Someone called me strict today, and that means a lot to me because I’m a recovering people pleaser.

Is there anyone here old enough to remember when typing was a class in high school?

God bless the student essay that is so confused and rambling, there is zero chance that they used AI.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

My goal weight is getting a magician to saw me in half.

Cover letters are so embarrassing. Why am I writing a love letter to this shitty company?

Do you think birds, once they get older, start people-watching?

I now have Taylor Swift as my alarm. Now I always wake up five minutes earlier so I don’t have to listen to it.

My card got declined at the barbershop so they put all the hair in my mouth and squeezed me until it came out of my head.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Adulting is realizing Monday is a better ‘off day’ than Friday.

Whoever named frogs got it 100% right. Those things are frogs.

If my son ever came out as gay, I’d be so furious. Furious that he never gave me fashion advice.

A spoonful of peanut butter from the jar will fix me.

It got weird when I thought both arm rests at the movie theatre were mine.

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I like listening to true crime podcasts while I clean my bathroom because I can pretend I’m destroying evidence.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

A woman’s G-spot can be found at the end of the word shopping.

I don’t need the audio tour at the museum, I have my teen to provide critical commentary the entire time.

As a man, it’s my job to mistake kindness for flirting.

You can’t change your past but you can change your pasta.

The Titanic is a great lesson of why “just the tip” can get you into a whole lot of trouble.

A new year resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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