Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇹 has downloaded:

I’m so jealous of people who live near a coastal area. What do you mean you can just go to the beach on a random Tuesday?

Someone from 🇨🇺 has viewed:

If you live in the same hemisphere as me, you’ve probably already heard me sneeze.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has viewed:

Socks teach us that being made for each other does not mean being together.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has downloaded:

I’ve never met a problem I couldn’t turn into a disaster.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has shared:

Sorry for the things I said when the internet was down for 10 minutes.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

They should remove the sex scenes from movies and then put them all into one big super sex scene movie they can show in theaters at the end of the year.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

One thing that sucks about being grown-up is not being able to say, “My mom said no,” when you don’t want someone to come over.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

Deleting dating apps to meet someone the old-fashioned way (in the HR department).

Someone from 🇮🇳 has bookmarked:

Can drunk people actually not control their actions or is it just an excuse to do some crazy stuff?

Someone from 🇪🇪 has viewed:

All mushrooms are edible. Some only once.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,669

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Discord:

If your first child is uncomplicated, then it’s a trick of nature to get you to have a second child. The second will be an unpredictable bundle of energy that seems to get by without sleep.

Just shared via Reddit:

Laying next to my charger waiting for my phone to die, that’s how lazy I am.

Shared recently on Slack:

I’m officially at the age where my favorite thing to do is sit down.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Everybody loves that comfort food until you end up with that comfort body.

Trending via Pinterest:

Has anyone lived long enough to buy a second bottle of Worcestershire sauce?

Just landed via Reddit:

DMs full of guys who wouldn’t know what to do with me.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

I’m so toxic, I can fight for a relationship I don’t even want.

Just landed via Instagram:

Many fruits can be great names… but the real challenge is naming a child after a vegetable….

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Planking is the only time we appreciate time.

Spotted on Messenger:

The thing about being 50+ is that whenever an opportunity to pee is available – you’re wise to take it.

If I had a tiny girlfriend, I would love to throw her across gaps so she can pull levers and open doors that get me to her part of the level.

0
If I had a tiny girlfriend, I would love to throw her across gaps so she can pull levers and open doors that get me to her part of the level.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
Sounds like a relationship built on trust… and creative problem-solving! 🏋️‍♀️🚀🗝️

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

48 shares on TikTok this month:

Why learn new slang? Stay bogus.

25 shares on Slack this month:

Pretty sure the inventor of noise-canceling headphones had a young kid trying to learn an instrument.

14 shares on Telegram this month:

I just want someone to miss me the way my 3 year old nephew misses me when I go to the washroom.

79 shares on WhatsApp this month:

What genius called it road rage and not locomotive?

84 shares on Messenger this month:

The note on this boxed wine says ‘Fresh up to 6 weeks after opening’. 6 weeks. Lol.

34 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I tried to walk like an Egyptian and now I need to see a Cairo practor.

75 shares on YouTube this month:

Please help my husband and I decide on dinner. We’ve narrowed it down to “It doesn’t matter” and “It’s your turn to choose”.

55 shares on Reddit this month:

May the algorithms be with you.

81 shares on Messenger this month:

Pro tip: Avoid the news for a couple of days and have some fun.

21 shares on X this month:

I don’t care if it’s cliché, I will always enjoy a ‘small town but something messed up is happening’ story.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

16 folks are currently checking 👀

The universe consists of 5% protons, 5% neutrons, 5% electrons, and 85% morons.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m almost finished reading your tweet. Love it so far.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

They should invent someone who holds me.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m at an age now where I start sentences with “I’m at an age now.”

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I have this rare skin disease called perfect.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Tonight I wanted to stop drinking but then I remembered the owner of the pub has a family to feed.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

If a man speaks in the forest and his wife is not there to hear him, is he still wrong?

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Toast doesn’t talk. How do you know it’s French?

19 folks are currently checking 👀

What happened to the art of just liking one person?

17 folks are currently checking 👀

The most unrealistic part of cooking shows is when they have enough room in their fridge to fit an entire baking sheet.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,279

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇦 has viewed:

Nothing more rude than taking a photo of yourself and it looking like how you actually look, and not how you look inside your head.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has copied:

I’m like if a birthday card with no money inside was a person.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has bookmarked:

Someone should bite my inner thighs just to see what type of noises I make. For science.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has shared:

I hope the aliens aren’t good at basketball. My chances of making it into the NBA are already slim.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has downloaded:

Some people have goals based on a summer body. Mine revolve entirely around the weight limit of my beach chairs.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has downloaded:

At what age do I delete Snapchat?

Someone from 🇺🇬 has viewed:

Imagine hearing the ice cream truck music, but at night.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has viewed:

She was rare, like a shopping cart at the grocery without a wobbly wheel.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has viewed:

English is so fake. How can you drink a drink, but you can’t food a food?

Someone from 🇨🇫 has bookmarked:

My only addiction is coffee, which is just like crack but is legal and tastes good.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Pinterest:

Adulting is realizing you can’t skip work like you skipped class.

Going viral on Slack:

Whoever first said, “It gets to a point,” was definitely at that point, and I feel them deeply.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

“Can my boyfriend come?” Will he contribute to our conversation, at least one question?

Going bananas on Instagram:

I’ve walked the walk, but nowadays I just sit the sit.

Making waves on Pinterest:

If they can make a nuclear reactor small enough to power a submarine, why can’t they make one for my house?

Making waves on TikTok:

If men didn’t exist, I would simply go for a 2 a.m. walk every night and listen to music in my AirPods.

Trending via X:

Nothing has paid off less than learning to do the Macarena.

Going bananas on WeChat:

Doctor: Your body has run out of magnesium. Me: OMg.

Spotted on Reddit:

It is a shame that nothing is built in America anymore. I just bought a TV that said: “Built in Antenna”. I don’t even know where that is.

Live now on Twitch:

Chocolate doesn’t ask silly questions, chocolate understands.

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴