Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇷 has shared:

Let’s ruin each other’s sleep schedules and call it romance.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

Sure, sex is great, but have you ever closed a dozen tabs after finishing an academic paper?

Someone from 🇹🇲 has viewed:

Now hush, Lil Labubu, don’t you cry, everything’s gonna be Dubai.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has bookmarked:

Hey girl, are you an extraterrestrial? ’Cause your husband’s out here acting like you don’t exist.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

Why is nobody questioning the quietness of the cosmos?

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

This is the dumbest apocalypse ever.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

People say opposites attract, but I say find a partner who’s deranged in the same ways you are and double your capacity to be annoying.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has copied:

What’s a polite way to tell someone you hope they get mauled by a bear?

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

An escape room, but it’s a bean bag chair in a hammock on a water bed in a bouncy house and you’re over 40. Good luck!

Someone from 🇧🇹 has bookmarked:

Spending the day with my mom and her mom, just observing the patterns.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

298 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,567

Funny Quotes Topics

17,623

Funny Quotes Images

15,567

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,389

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on TikTok:

Automated phone system: To speak to a representative, please enter the last twelve digits of Pi.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Does your blood pump that way just for me?

Making waves on Slack:

“Grey’s Anatomy” but it’s told entirely through the lens of the hospital’s HR department.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I don’t have a favourite person, but I do have a favourite cheese.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Laundry has to be the most sinister chore. Always waiting, always lurking.

Going viral on Reddit:

I’ll be honest. I can’t solve your problems. What I can do is create new, bigger problems that will make your current problems seem quaint by comparison.

Making waves on Messenger:

Ever since I was a little girl I knew I wanted to leave work early.

Just landed via Messenger:

A girl was coming over till she wasn’t—that’s what happened.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Why is everyone so chill about parrots being able to talk? That’s a whole animal. Talking.

Going bananas on YouTube:

Never miss a good chance to shut up.

In university, you can literally tell who had no freedom at home.

3 weeks ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Like watching a penguin discover roller skates for the first time 🐧🛼🤯

freedom, home, humor, literally, observation, student, tell, university

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I’m a bit of a traditionalist, so on my birthday, I smear my body with embryonic fluid.

2 months ago

birthday, bit, body, embryonic, embryonic fluid, fluid, humor, humorous, i, joke, quirky, satire, traditionalist, unconventional
Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Make it worse by saying they look tired.

2 months ago

advice, battle, empathy, everyone, fighting, humor, interaction, know, meet, nothing, sarcasm, saying, social, social interaction, tired, understanding, worse
Nothing has improved the quality of my life more than living beyond my means.

2 months ago

happiness, humor, irony, life, lifestyle, living, means, nothing, quality, spending
Dating apps aren’t working, time to walk into a cafe looking confused.

2 months ago

activity, app, apps, cafe, confused, dating, dating app, fun, fun activity, humor, looking, situation, social, social situation, time, walk, working
The minute I start feeling like a mother to a man, the relationship is over.

4 months ago

breakup, feeling, humor, i, man, minute, mother, over, relationship, start
Let the good times roll. Let the bad times crawl. Let the acceptable times do the hopscotch.

2 months ago

acceptable, acceptable time, bad, bad time, crawl, fun, good, good time, hopscotch, humor, let, roll, time, times

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

50 shares on Pinterest this month:

I just sneezed and farted at the same time. I think my body just took a screenshot.

21 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I made some bad choices in life, but I never bought a pair of Crocs.

38 shares on Slack this month:

Whoever said “team work makes the dream work” needs to explain that to my many personalities.

61 shares on TikTok this month:

You’ve agreed to go out with me, so that’s going to immediately count against you.

18 shares on WeChat this month:

Tonight, my poor liver has to pay again for what went wrong during the week.

95 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I may not have lost all my marbles yet, but there’s a small hole in the bag somewhere.

98 shares on Discord this month:

“Never let someone else destroy your stuff when you can destroy it yourself”, every kid I ever.

30 shares on X this month:

Your future doctor is using ChatGPT to pass med school so you better start eating healthy.

84 shares on WhatsApp this month:

And for my next trick, I will turn yesterday’s sweatpants into today’s sweatpants.

88 shares on WeChat this month:

Lazy is such an ugly word. I prefer to call it selective participation.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

Cowboy outfits should be called ranch dressing.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has downloaded:

The title of my autobiography is going to be ‘You’d Think I’d Learn By Now, But Nope.’

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

Having a crush is so fun, it’s literally just butterflies and delusion.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has viewed:

Still can’t believe America has a federal holiday to celebrate the hit movie Independence Day.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

I’m never drinking again, unless something is going on later today.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

Sorry, can’t. I’m currently nodding in class so the teacher doesn’t feel sad.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has bookmarked:

I’ve been reading the room for 20 minutes. It’s not looking so good.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has downloaded:

Too many types of pasta. I can say my fav is Fliccaroni and not one of you can be sure if it’s real. Look at you googling it.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

“I’ll run it by the boss” is one of the peak boomerisms you can say as a married man. It feels electric.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

My ex said I had commitment issues but this giant jar of Nutella says otherwise.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Have we checked all food to see if exploding it makes it into something better or did we just stop with corn?

Seen just now on Instagram:

Life is giving me no lemons. It’s throwing watermelons.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Apparently, when you treat someone the same way they treat you, they get offended!

Shared recently on Reddit:

Girls won’t admit it, but they don’t like super fine dudes; they like medium ugly, funny dudes that dress nice.

Shared recently on Telegram:

If you’re feeling lonely, start a small business. Then you’ll have a little company.

Making waves on X:

Why do babies stare at you like they know you from somewhere?

Spotted on Instagram:

I always set two alarms, one for “Good Intentions Me” and one for “The Real Me”

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Going to the bathroom at night with my flashlight on and a dog next to me feels like I’m gonna solve a mystery.

Breaking via YouTube:

I’m on this new diet where I don’t consume anything that talks to me before the first coffee.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

The year I was born, getting a little far on that little scrolly thing.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

In university, you can literally tell who had no freedom at home.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I’m a bit of a traditionalist, so on my birthday, I smear my body with embryonic fluid.

Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Make it worse by saying they look tired.

Nothing has improved the quality of my life more than living beyond my means.

Dating apps aren’t working, time to walk into a cafe looking confused.

The minute I start feeling like a mother to a man, the relationship is over.

Let the good times roll. Let the bad times crawl. Let the acceptable times do the hopscotch.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨