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Commentary:
How about becoming a professional tissue tester? 🤣🧻 Guaranteed job security and plenty of opportunities to test those tear ducts! Who needs tissues for the sad movies when you can have them for work? 😂 #NoCriticismAllowed

best, criticism, crying, easily, employment, handle, humor, irony, job, laughter, sensitivity, someone

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

It’s so important to warm up before any physical activity, like getting out of bed.

0

2 months ago

activity, bed, before, getting, getting out of bed, humor, important, motivation, physical, physical activity, warm, warm-up
I hate when I get ready too quickly and have to sit on the couch, fully dressed, and wait like an idiot.

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2 months ago

boredom, couch, dressed, getting, getting ready, hate, i, idiot, impatience, overprepared, ready, sit, too, wait, waiting
A pretty girl like me should be in the sky, sitting on a star.

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3 months ago

compliment, flattery, girl, humor, me, pretty, pretty girl, self-confidence, should, sitting, sky, star
I see from the back of your car that you have found Jesus, but not your turn signal.

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3 months ago

back, car, driving, found, humor, i, Jesus, joke, religion, road, road safety, safety, signal, traffic, turn, turn signal
If they don’t look at you like you’re magic, disappear like Houdini.

0

2 months ago

attention, disappear, Houdini, humor, magic, mystery, relationship, self-worth
The cool thing about being a procrastinator is, really bad ideas also don’t ever make it off the ground.

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2 months ago

bad, bad idea, being, cool, cool thing, decision, delay, ever, ground, humor, idea, ideas, procrastinator, thing

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

23 shares on Reddit this month:

Puberty was a hair-raising experience.

84 shares on Messenger this month:

Wow, this person is full of shit. Oh, I’m on my own page.

18 shares on Threads this month:

To the spirits in my walls: going to the store, be right back.

22 shares on YouTube this month:

Never underestimate the healing power of not watching the news.

75 shares on X this month:

Whatever you do today, do it with the confidence of a 4-year old wearing a Batman cape.

51 shares on TikTok this month:

You were promised to me 3,000 years ago.

65 shares on Facebook this month:

You don’t know about stupidity until your female friends open up about their love life.

34 shares on LinkedIn this month:

“Topless” doesn’t always mean breasts or a convertible. Sometimes it also means the brain.

55 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Of course I stay hydrated. Carbohydrated.

11 shares on TikTok this month:

People who take care of chickens are literally chicken tenders.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇪 has downloaded:

If small talk burned calories, maybe I’d consider it.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

Stop roasting yourself, you’re not a marshmallow.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

Daniel Craig leaving Bond to become Benoit Blanc is one of the best things to ever happen.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has downloaded:

Sometimes I do something completely out of character, like say no to a slice of pizza, or trust someone.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

Phone addiction got so bad that watching a movie feels productive.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has viewed:

When you’re feeling down, just turn up the music a little louder.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

Unfortunately, I’m not nonchalant or mysterious. I’m just a naturally awkward person who becomes talkative once I’m comfortable.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has downloaded:

Every day, a new coworker asks if you’ve used ChatGPT, and the conversation doesn’t end if you say “No.”

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

Marriage is 33.3% hiding to eat snacks because you and your spouse are supposed to be on a diet.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

Engaging in deforestation (trimming my bush).

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WeChat:

My body is a “wonder what happened” land.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I love sleeping in fishnets. Makes you feel like a big honey roast ham.

Just landed via Telegram:

My therapist said I should face my fears. So I turned my phone back on.

Just landed via Facebook:

Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you, but not in the one ahead.

Trending via WeChat:

When they dress up really nice, but all you can think about is the thrill of taking it off.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Dear people who talk on speakerphone out in public. Everyone around you hates you.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

Being a dinosaur sounds kinda nice. No bills, no work, just extinct.

Shared recently on YouTube:

I try not to post too much, to give everyone else a better chance at being seen.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Optimist: The glass is ½ full. Pessimist: The glass is ½ empty. Excel: The glass is January 2nd.

Trending via WeChat:

Nothing betrays your age more than the slang you won’t let go of.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

What’s the best job for someone who cries very easily and cannot handle any criticism?

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

It’s so important to warm up before any physical activity, like getting out of bed.

I hate when I get ready too quickly and have to sit on the couch, fully dressed, and wait like an idiot.

A pretty girl like me should be in the sky, sitting on a star.

I see from the back of your car that you have found Jesus, but not your turn signal.

If they don’t look at you like you’re magic, disappear like Houdini.

The cool thing about being a procrastinator is, really bad ideas also don’t ever make it off the ground.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨