Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic 'You've changed!' remark. 🙄 Well, better to change and not like you than to stay the same and still not like you, right? 😂💁‍♂️"

change, humor, i, relationship, sarcasm

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

“I’m in a really good place right now, not mentally. I’m just indoors with air conditioning.”

0

2 months ago

air, air conditioning, comfort, conditioning, good, health, humor, indoor, indoors, just, mental, mental health, mentally, place, relaxation, right
Every time I watch “The Godfather”, I notice some new detail (they’re Italian???).

0

2 months ago

comedy, detail, every, film, Godfather, humor, i, italian, movie, new, notice, observation, time, watch
If you order a pizza with veggies on it, you can tell people you had a salad.

0

2 months ago

clever, diet, eating, food, humor, joke, order, people, pizza, salad, tell, veggy
Carefully choosing which wine to pair with a McRib.

0

2 months ago

carefully, casual, casual dining, choice, dining, fast, fast food, food, food humor, food joke, humor, joke, McRib, pairing, quirky, quirky choice, wine, wine pairing
Offering friendship as a consolation prize for a failed romantic connection attempt is absolutely cruel.

0

2 months ago

absolutely, attempt, connection, consolation, consolation prize, cruelty, dating, failed, friendship, humor, prize, rejection, relationship, romantic, romantic connection
YOLO because stupid people don’t know what Carpe Diem means.

0

1 month ago

carpe, Carpe Diem, diem, humor, irony, know, Latin, Latin phrase, life, life motto, means, motto, people, phrase, sarcasm, slang, stupid, stupidity, yolo

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

38 shares on X this month:

Horror movies should add bloopers, so after watching the main film, you’ll be able to sleep.

14 shares on TikTok this month:

If you were a dinosaur, you’d be a Gorgeousaurus.

73 shares on Pinterest this month:

The idea that wisdom teeth are just some random glitch that God forgot to patch, so now we have to pull them out with modern technology, is retarded.

59 shares on Snapchat this month:

I’m sorry, I didn’t realize how quiet your bathroom exhaust fan was.

100 shares on YouTube this month:

Woke up feeling not too shabby for a 60-year-old. The only problem is I’m still in my 40s.

84 shares on Facebook this month:

Diarrhea awareness week starts today. Runs through Sunday.

81 shares on Instagram this month:

Cookbook, but each recipe includes a photo of all the dishes that need to be cleaned after making it.

93 shares on Instagram this month:

Does everyone in the world want to come to my house tomorrow?

97 shares on TikTok this month:

I’ve never completed a marathon, but I’ve listened to my mom tell a story, so don’t talk to me about endurance.

74 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I don’t do exercise because one time I kneed myself in the face doing a burpee.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇱 has viewed:

I love admitting when I’m wrong, because it gives me a break from always being right, like finally.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has downloaded:

I hate when people call my phone! I don’t use it for that.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

The most incredible thing about James Bond is the way he can walk into any hotel room and immediately know how to use the shower.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

I only trust people who give off unemployable energy.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

But he was so nice on the prison phone calls.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

Welcome to your 50’s. Your doctor and pharmacist are both in your contacts now.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

Watching my wife absolutely hate my daughter’s boyfriend while being nice and hospitable to him has made me question every interaction I’ve had with another human being in my life.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has downloaded:

Dance like nobody’s watching, except God, the NSA, and Santa Claus.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has shared:

You should never forget where you came from. That’s probably where your keys are.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has bookmarked:

Sober in a taxi: Please. Stop talking to me. Drunk in a taxi: … And that, Mick, is why I’m emotionally unavailable, I suppose.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via YouTube:

Jehovah’s Witnesses tell the worst knock knock jokes.

Trending via Pinterest:

The problem with parental controls is I need my kid to help me figure out how to set them up.

Going viral on Discord:

Fundamentally, I understand chess, because I too would never let my king feel unsafe.

Just shared via WeChat:

You can have glossy lips or you can have a cat. You can’t have both.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

You’re so vain. You probably think me being in this tree outside your house is about you.

Broadcasted on Discord:

Taking a Hooters waitress on a date to a different Hooters on her night off.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Spotted on Messenger:

The most romantic minds of our time are being subjected to situationships.

Just shared via Twitch:

Maybe there’s an alternate universe where onions cry when they chop up humans, you don’t know.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

My mouth moves faster than my survival instincts.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

“You’ve changed!” Yeah, I don’t like you.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

“I’m in a really good place right now, not mentally. I’m just indoors with air conditioning.”

Every time I watch “The Godfather”, I notice some new detail (they’re Italian???).

If you order a pizza with veggies on it, you can tell people you had a salad.

Carefully choosing which wine to pair with a McRib.

Offering friendship as a consolation prize for a failed romantic connection attempt is absolutely cruel.

YOLO because stupid people don’t know what Carpe Diem means.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨