Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic 'You've changed!' remark. 🙄 Well, better to change and not like you than to stay the same and still not like you, right? 😂💁‍♂️"

change, humor, i, relationship, sarcasm

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I make sure to post my political opinions after my selfies have gone viral to cull the herd.

0

2 months ago

after, gone, herd, herd mentality, humor, i, media, mentality, opinion, opinions, political, politics, post, satire, selfie, social, social media, sure, viral
“Do not touch” must be one of the scariest things to read in braille.

0

2 months ago

braille, caution, disability, humor, irony, perception, read, safety, tactile, things, touch, warning
Sometimes I do something completely out of character, like say no to a slice of pizza, or trust someone.

0

2 months ago

character, choices, food, humor, i, irony, pizza, say, slice, someone, something, sometimes, trust, unexpected
I didn’t know that Rome wasn’t built in a day. I wasn’t on that job.

0

2 months ago

construction, day, historical, historical reference, humor, i, job, know, reference, Rome, sarcasm, wit
If Keith Richards survived the ’70s, the ’80s, and 1.2 million Marlboros, I can probably survive anything.

0

2 months ago

12, 1970s, 1980s, 80s, anything, humor, i, keith, Keith Richards, Marlboro, Marlboros, million, resilience, richards, smoking, survival, survive
Fog. When nature is too lazy to load the complete environment.

0

2 months ago

complete, environment, fog, humor, lazy, nature, too

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

74 shares on Twitch this month:

A recent study showed that people who are reading this text thought they were learning something useful.

23 shares on Messenger this month:

I’m tired of pretending talking about the weather isn’t fun.

29 shares on YouTube this month:

Just being myself is how we got into this mess.

26 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Dear brain, please finally learn the difference between hunger and boredom. I’m getting fat.

12 shares on Twitch this month:

I always wait 3 minutes after each post for the applause to die down.

46 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Coding: Where incessantly talking to yourself seems completely normal and debugging is like being a detective in a movie where you are both the detective and the perpetrator.

92 shares on Facebook this month:

Not sure who needs to hear this, but make your bloody bed.

51 shares on TikTok this month:

I suck at flirting. I be like “is that so?”

51 shares on Messenger this month:

Sometimes you just need a Saturday to sleep all day and do absolutely nothing.

20 shares on X this month:

It’s like ten thousand views when all you need is a like.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

I have never seen a sad person sliding down a water slide.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

Very disappointed to find out that the universal remote control I bought does not control the universe.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

An escape room, but it’s a bean bag chair in a hammock on a water bed in a bouncy house and you’re over 40. Good luck!

Someone from 🇧🇩 has bookmarked:

Home is where you can say anything because nobody’s really listening, anyway.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

I am never hungrier than when I leave the dentist and told I can’t eat right away.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

How does pasta water know when you’re not looking?

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

You never realize how many curse words are in a song till you play it for your family.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has copied:

You should get one IG story in addition to your one phone call when you’re arrested.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

I wonder how much this “Never mind, it’s only 10 bucks” has already cost me?

Someone from 🇻🇺 has viewed:

Can you imagine how hot I’d be if I ate right and took care of my body? I’m not gonna do it, but can you imagine?

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Instagram:

I love when kids tell me what they want to be when they grow up, because I’m still looking for ideas.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Before we become friends, could you please sign this NDA.

Spotted on Discord:

People pass a joint around like it’s no big deal, but the minute I ask someone to do that with their Subway sandwich, I’m a weirdo.

Spotted on Reddit:

Why’d they call it a fly swatter and not a splatula?

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

I have a very particular set of useless skills.

Just landed via Reddit:

You have to be careful about sending your spouse things on social media. You send too many things, next thing you know chores are being redistributed because of “all the free time you clearly have”.

Just shared via X:

Opening this app is like lighting a cigarette.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

My body is like my phone battery. Usually drained by 4pm.

Seen just now on Facebook:

People in NYC are like, let me know if you’re ever in NYC.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

“You’ve changed!” Yeah, I don’t like you.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I make sure to post my political opinions after my selfies have gone viral to cull the herd.

“Do not touch” must be one of the scariest things to read in braille.

Sometimes I do something completely out of character, like say no to a slice of pizza, or trust someone.

I didn’t know that Rome wasn’t built in a day. I wasn’t on that job.

If Keith Richards survived the ’70s, the ’80s, and 1.2 million Marlboros, I can probably survive anything.

Fog. When nature is too lazy to load the complete environment.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨