Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Remember, it's all about timing! 🤪 Say something bizarre to distract from your strange actions. 🙃 Who knew being weird could be so strategic? 😂"

anxiety, busy, funny observation, nobody, notice, noticed, observation, said, self-consciousness, social, social anxiety, thing, too, weird, weird thing, worry

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

It’s called the Summer Olympics so one of the events should be running in flip flops to catch the ice cream man.

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2 months ago

activity, catch, comedy, cream, event, flip, flip flops, flops, fun, funny event, humorous, humorous sports, ice, ice cream man, man, Olympics, playful, playful activity, running, should, sports, summer, summer fun, Summer Olympics
I don’t like being asked “are you at home?” Please expand further so I can know whether I’m at home or not.

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2 months ago

communication, confusion, home, home inquiry, humor, inquiry, irony, question
I’m the type of husband that helps his wife look for her missing chocolate that I ate.

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2 months ago

chocolate, help, husband, i, missing, relationship, snack, wife
My wife and I are going to quit our jobs and travel until we run out of money. I estimate we’ll be home around 9 p.m. tonight.

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2 months ago

9, around, estimate, going, home, humor, i, job, jobs, money, night, plan, quit, relationship, run, tonight, travel, well, wife
The only thing I miss all day is my bed.

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2 months ago

bed, comfort, day, i, laziness, miss, relaxation, sleep, thing
Why do men always think “looking for fun” means sex? Wat if I want us to draw?

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2 months ago

activity, always, draw, expectations, fun, humor, i, looking, means, men, relationship, sex, think, want

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

17 shares on Discord this month:

It’s almost bed time, so I’ll just check my e-mail, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and watch a season of my favorite show on Netflix real quick.

50 shares on TikTok this month:

I love when my husband says, “correct me if I’m wrong,” like I would pass up that opportunity.

38 shares on Slack this month:

The first five days after the weekend are always the hardest.

48 shares on WeChat this month:

I am sick and tired of going to the bathroom. It’s been forty years. It should all be out by now.

84 shares on Instagram this month:

My head is starting to get dented from hitting rock bottom so often.

36 shares on WeChat this month:

My phone is like my lover, it’s the last thing I see at night, and the first thing I wake up to every morning.

32 shares on TikTok this month:

Working as a 911 operator but hanging up when someone starts screaming because I’m an empath, and it overwhelms me.

56 shares on Pinterest this month:

The night is dark and full of terrors. My day is long and full of meetings. Same thing.

72 shares on Instagram this month:

Blocking me is like blocking the sun, the moon and the stars.

32 shares on Discord this month:

Dating profiles should make you share a sound bite of you sneezing.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇩 has downloaded:

My friend says to me, “What rhymes with orange?” And I told him, “No, it doesn’t.”

Someone from 🇷🇸 has shared:

I’m so old, I used to block people by simply holding the door shut.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has copied:

Being a dog must be wild, everyone you meet is your masseuse.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

Nobody is doing it like me because this is probably not the right way to do it.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

I’m only grumpy when I’m awake.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

Welcome to my very loose interpretation of ‘functioning adult’.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

I’ve been thinking. Is ‘fat’ short for anything? Like an old word or something?

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

You can always tell when someone is on a diet by how they scrape every last bit from that yogurt container.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has downloaded:

I don’t need the web for attention, I jog in a wedding dress.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has copied:

The streets are not for me. I belong in an enchanted forest, eating berries, and talking to my animal friends.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Threads:

I’m planning to eat the rich, but can I sub out fries for a salad?

Trending via Twitch:

“The Nightmare Before Christmas” just means, January 1st – December 24th.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Before I had kids I was only vaguely aware that Saturday had a 7am.

Going viral on Telegram:

Goodbye, August, don’t let the door hit you on the way out.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Sharpening a pencil at the bin was the childhood equivalent of taking a cigarette break.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

A degree in international law is about as real as a degree in Dothraki.

Seen just now on Instagram:

My bad habits got renewed for another season.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Sleep well, middle finger—you’ve got a big day ahead of you tomorrow.

Going viral on Facebook:

Unfortunately most of my sex noises come from trying to get out of bed.

Trending via Snapchat:

Alexa, play everyone that played me.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Don’t worry, nobody noticed the weird thing you did. They’re too busy with the weird thing you said.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

It’s called the Summer Olympics so one of the events should be running in flip flops to catch the ice cream man.

I don’t like being asked “are you at home?” Please expand further so I can know whether I’m at home or not.

I’m the type of husband that helps his wife look for her missing chocolate that I ate.

My wife and I are going to quit our jobs and travel until we run out of money. I estimate we’ll be home around 9 p.m. tonight.

The only thing I miss all day is my bed.

Why do men always think “looking for fun” means sex? Wat if I want us to draw?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨