Wordgag ツ

4 months ago
Share →: New challenge called “don’t say ‘wow it’s already dark by five these days’ for the rest of winter”

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic battle against the inevitable darkness creeping in early. It's like trying to resist hitting the snooze button on a Monday morning – a challenge that tests our willpower and self-restraint. Let's see who emerges victorious in this epic struggle of seasonal observation!"
4 months ago
Share →: Today I started gardening. I planted myself in front of the TV and I sat there the entire day.

Commentary:
"Ah, a modern-day nature lover embracing the joys of indoor gardening! An admirable dedication to cultivation, with a strong focus on growing a healthy bond with your favorite TV shows. Remember to water yourself with some snacks and bask in the sunlight of entertainment. Keep blooming and thriving, dear plant enthusiast!"
4 months ago
Share →: Computer dating is fine, if you’re a computer.

Commentary:
"Looks like the only 'compatibility' issue here is between humans and their dating algorithms. Who knew computers had such high standards for a partner's processing power?"
4 months ago
Share →: My wife and I always eat dinner as fast as possible so we can have a popsicle.

Commentary:
Looks like they've found the perfect motivation to speed up dinner – a frozen treat waiting at the finish line! Who knew popsicles could be the ultimate dinner incentive? Just remember, brain freeze is a small price to pay for dessert efficiency!
4 months ago
Share →: A fun wedding bit is to sit next to a random guest, point to the bride or groom & whisper, “it should’ve been you”

Commentary:
"Weddings are like a real-life game of musical chairs, but with hearts instead of chairs. Just remember, if you're feeling mischievous, there's always the 'should've been you' card to play. Just be prepared for some surprised looks and maybe a few awkward laughs!"
4 months ago
Share →: Pool rules: You’re not allowed to do anything that begins with the words ‘Hey everyone watch this!’

Commentary:
"Ah, the infamous 'Hey everyone watch this!' clause – the universal signal for impending chaos and potential disaster at the pool. It's like a siren call for lifeguards to brace themselves and for spectators to prepare for some quality entertainment. Remember, folks, the only thing you should be showing off at the pool is your impeccable cannonball form!"
4 months ago
Share →: Thinking about ignoring daily mess by creating new holiday decor mess.

Commentary:
Ah, the classic holiday dilemma: trading one mess for another in the name of festive cheer! Who needs a spotless house when you can have a beautifully chaotic display of holiday decorations instead? It's the perfect excuse to put off cleaning and embrace the merry madness of the season!
4 months ago
Share →: Now I understand why old people sit outside just to sit outside.

Commentary:
Ah, the joy of simply sitting outside and contemplating life's mysteries like why do we park in driveways and drive on parkways? 🤔😂 Embrace the leisurely art of "sitting outside just to sit outside" – it's the ultimate wisdom in disguise! 🌼👵🏼🌳 #OutdoorEnlightenment
4 months ago
Share →: Genuinely nothing worse than going bowling with people who are actually good. Like, why are you doing all that?

Commentary:
"Me at the bowling alley feeling attacked by all the strikes and spares from pro bowlers like 🎳💥 'Excuse me, can you kindly miss a few shots so I can pretend I have a chance in this game, please?' 😆 #BowlingStruggles"
4 months ago
Share →: Women only want one thing and it is to walk down a dimly-lit cobblestone street with the devil.

Commentary:
Ah, the eternal allure of a dimly-lit cobblestone street and a devilish companion! 😈🌃 Sounds like the perfect recipe for a memorable night out. Who needs a knight in shining armor when you can stroll with the devil in style, right ladies? 😉👠 #DevilishlyDelightful